Twitter Memester Carpe Donktum Mocks the Trans Cult, and It’s Riotous

(Scott Threlkeld/The Advocate via AP)

Carpe Donktum calls himself an “Eternally Sarcastic Memesmith,” and his eternally sarcastic memes have earned him over 335,000 followers on Twitter, as well as the undying wrath of the authoritarian Left: his pro-Trump memes were so effective that he was banned from Twitter in June 2020, at the height of Trump’s reelection campaign, and only reinstated when Elon Musk took over. Over the last few days, he has begun calling attention to the transgender cult’s grooming of the youngest children in schools in a particularly piquant — and riotous — way.


It all started on Thursday, when Carpe Donktum tweeted: “As a 3rd grade teacher, I often talk about Jesus with my students, they are so excited to hear about my faith. They point to the cross on [the] wall and ask me about the resurrection. Some have gotten baptized in the sink, as long as they don’t tell their parents. It’s our secret.” This tweet now has 3.7 million views. It was an obvious send-up of primary school teachers who push transgenderism on their students and keep it all secret from their parents, and just in case anyone didn’t get it, Donktum drove the point home in a series of follow-up tweets.

“I hope this doesn’t get me fired, please don’t share this to [sic] libs,” he added, and then: “want you guys to understand something, I am NOT grooming these young apostles, THEY COME TO ME and I follow their questions back to it’s [sic] source These kids feel something is not right inside them and I help them to understand that Jesus is what they are missing in their life.”


Warming to his topic, Carpe kept going: “These kids are so excited about their new spiritual identity that they devote every moment to studying the Bible. But sometimes, they lack the focus, in those cases the school nurse prescribes distraction blockers to help complete the transformation. Don’t tell mom and dad tho.” He took the opportunity to push other Leftist buttons as well: “One of my fondest memories from last year was when Taleb made his transformation from Islam to Christ. To celebrate his new identity we had a pizza party with his new favorite topping, Canadian bacon. Sometimes, I buy him a hotdog at lunch, since he can’t have them at home.”

On Monday, he went even farther: “I DO NOT INDOCTRINATE OR GROOM THEM. They come to me with questions about their spiritual identity and I help them understand the transformation taking place in their heart. When they are ready, I give them priestly robes to wear, we do the baptism, and they take communion.”

All this is readily reminiscent of transgender elementary school teachers such as Skye Tooley in Los Angeles, who spoke out last Monday against Florida’s pro-sanity legislation that is designed to protect children from predatory trans teachers. “Hi! I’m a queer teacher,” Tooley said, “and I 1000 percent do not support this bill. And yes, I do know what’s in it. The bill, in itself, is just another way to stigmatize the LGBTQ+ community. Kids as young as three and four are actually aware of their gender identity, even if they don’t have the language for it. Also, very aware of who they like and who they don’t like. Heterosexuality is pushed on our kids on a daily basis at a very young age through the media, through books, the first Disney movie that you saw.” Leftists applaud such teachers, but they weren’t as pleased with Carpe Donktum.


Related: Readin’, ‘Ritin, and Rainbow Madness: Drag Queen Forces 11-Year-Old to Leave Class for Denying 73 Genders

Many didn’t get the sarcasm and took Carpe Donktum’s claims with the utmost seriousness. One down-the-line Leftist activist with “#WearAMask, #Vaccinate, #MyBodyMyChoice” in her Twitter bio tweeted: “Holy crap! This teacher is baptizing kids in her classroom sink, ‘as long as they don’t tell their parents’!” Another fumed at Carpe: “Shut up you lying turd. Separation of church and state exists because of people like you who brainwash and abuse children. You shouldn’t have your job and you should lose your children if you have any.” Others tagged the ACLU, trying to get Carpe fired from his alleged job, and far-Left Star Trek actor George Takei, trying to make Carpe the focus of a more general cancellation.

Yet the same Leftists celebrate everything Carpe Donktum tweeted when it comes to transgender activists talking about how they brainwash and indoctrinate children and keep their actions secret from their parents. Carpe Donktum’s point was made in abundance, although it seems to have escaped those whom he was skewering most directly.


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