Two-hundred-and-forty-six years ago, a group of colonists — second-class citizens in King George’s England — decided they didn’t like being looked down on anymore by highborn, inbred men who were no better than they were but were held in higher esteem because of who their father was.
So they revolted to rid themselves of a society that depended on titles and castles and such in favor of a slightly more egalitarian setup; your station in life was determined by how smart and clever and industrious you were. Of course, it also depended on who you knew, but that’s true anywhere under any system.
To no one’s surprise, nations all across the world saw what those former colonists did and thought it was a pretty cool idea. They, too, axed their king or queen — sometimes literally — and joined the republic lineup.
But Great Britain thought it was still swell to bend the knee to a royal highness even though the royal corgies had more power than the person wearing the crown. Well, they’re welcome to that kind of silliness. We Americans, a completely grown-up country, don’t believe that one’s station in life should be determined by who their mommy or daddy were.
And that’s how it should be.
So I get a belly laugh watching the remnants of power and privilege in England run around pretending that what they believe is important or that who they’re boffing matters to anyone but starry-eyed teenage girls dreaming of becoming a princess by marrying a prince.
Currently, one of the inconsequential heirs to the throne — a guy named Harry (presumably because Tom and Dick and already been taken) — is embroiled in a scandal by airing all of his family’s dirty laundry in a book called Afterthought — or maybe it’s called Spare as in Harry is a “spare” heir to the throne, being second in line.
This was actually a very precarious position to be in 500 years ago. “Spare” heirs had a nasty habit of disappearing lest they get it in their heads to become THE heir to the throne.
Harry need not worry about that sort of thing. But being disowned by his fabulously wealthy family is a real possibility.
God forbid poor Harry might actually have to work for a living.
According to the outlet, the only thing PH faces at this point for spilling his guts is being “written out of the script” for King Charles‘ coronation ceremony in May — when he’s officially crowned and all that jazz. That doesn’t mean the Duke can’t attend, though.
The Times’ Royal Editor, Roya Nikkhah, tweeted this tidbit as a follow-up to her post … “I can also reveal that Prince Harry has been written out of the script for the Coronation, with no official role in the service if he attends. Breaking with tradition, Charles will scrap royal dukes kneeling and paying homage to the monarch. Only William will perform that role.”
“Royal dukes kneeling and paying homage”? In 2023? In a great, big, grown-up country and not a Disney theme park?
Sheesh.
So, it sounds like Harry can, in fact, roll through if he wants … but will have to sit in the peanut gallery with all the others, while Prince William takes center stage next to Dad. All things considered, that’s mild. Some speculated Harry would be uninvited altogether.
As for Willy … The Times claims, through Royal sources, that he’s “burning with anger” over Harry’s assertions — namely, that he allegedly attacked his brother, insulted his wife, Meghan Markle, and encouraged him to wear that Nazi costume all those years ago.
Dear America, I know it’s a national pastime to ogle the rich and famous and celebrate their troubles. But couldn’t we stick with Elon Musk, Bill Gates, or maybe some broken-down Hollywood actress who’s trying to kick the coke habit for the 10th time? That kind of weepy stuff plays very well for readers of The Star or National Enquirer.
The British royal family couldn’t survive without millions of Americans hanging on every word or gruesomely ugly act and indulging our penchant for glorifying royalty at the expense of good old republican personalities and values.
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