Elon Musk has begun making layoffs at Twitter, and, before the day is done, as many as 3,750 Tweeps will be former employees.
Now, we take no pleasure in people losing their jobs, even though, as a group, Twitter employees worked ceaselessly to destroy the lives and livelihoods of untold conservatives, conservative publications, and thought leaders for the crime of wrongthink for years.
It’s estimated that half of the Twitter employees worldwide will be sent a “Your Role at Twitter” email and be set free to pursue their future lives elsewhere as censors, scolds, and Karens. It’s even possible that some Obama administration officials who embedded into Silicon Valley like ticks after 2016 could be among those who are allowed to fly away to their destinies as critical theory grifters, cognitive infrastructure specialists, cable hosts, and, of course, wine snobs.
Twitter layoffs begin in 12 hours. They have so many employees folks just have to sit in front of their computers and wait. Building has been locked down. Badges have been disabled. pic.twitter.com/JQvIpIb2a8
— TheQuartering (@TheQuartering) November 4, 2022
Here’s a look at the email sent to employees on what to expect on Friday, which started out with “Team” and ended with a reminder that they signed an NDA and best keep quiet.
Team,
In an effort to place Twitter on a healthy path, we will go through the difficult process of reducing our global workforce on Friday. We recognize that this will impact a number of individuals who have made valuable contributions to Twitter, but this action is unfortunately
necessary to ensure the company’s success moving forward.Given the nature of our distributed workforce and our desire to inform impacted individuals as quickly as possible, communications for this process will take place via email. By 9AM PST on Friday Nov. 4th, everyone will receive an individual email with the subject line: Your
Role at Twitter.[…]
To help ensure the safety of each employee as well as Twitter systems and customer data, our offices will be temporarily closed and all badge access will be suspended. If you are in an office or on your way to an office, please return home.
We acknowledge this is an incredibly challenging experience to go through, whether or not you are impacted. Thank you for continuing to adhere to Twitter policies that prohibit you from discussing confidential company information on social media, with the press or elsewhere.
We are grateful for your contributions to Twitter and for your patience as we move through this process.
Thank you.
Twitter has 7,500 employees worldwide, and as many as half are expected to be cut loose. There are probably fewer than 3,750 that need to get the dreaded email on Friday. That’s because many of them swore they’d leave after Elon Musk took over their beloved Twitter – and commenced turning it into a cesspool of free speech!
PJ Media boss lady Paula Bolyard noticed that the headcount at Twitter seemed a bit excessive as compared to one of Musk’s other companies. She noted that if Elon Musk could send things into space with 9,500 employees, “how can Twitter possibly keep 7,500 employees busy?”
If @SpaceX and @elonmusk can do this with 9,500 employees, how can @Twitter possibly keep 7,500 employees busy? https://t.co/K38NrvPHHy
— Paula Bolyard (@pbolyard) November 4, 2022
As we watched the drama unfold Thursday night – on Twitter naturally – shadow-banned Wayne Dupree may have had the best bon voyage. “Twitter employee pronouns now was/were,” he cracked.
Twitter employee pronouns are now was/were.
— Wayne DuPree (Shadow-Banned) 🇺🇸 (@WayneDupreeShow) November 4, 2022
But there will be no schadenfreude here, no sir. Because this guy says that the people who got early notice they’re out of there are deliriously happy.
Talking to a couple of Twitter employees just now who learned they don't work there anymore when their email stopped working. I have never talked to people more excited to get laid off in my entire life.
— Ben Collins (@oneunderscore__) November 4, 2022
One college professor bemoaned that “Twitter employees don’t have tenure.” Talk about sitting in the Ivory Towers of academia!
And this guy said, paraphrasing here, “hey, it’s not funny, you guys!”
I don’t know how people on the right think they’re owning Twitter employees by saying they’ll now have to get a job at Burger King functions knowing so little about how the world — and tech — actually works. You’re owning… yourself. You are the only one who looks ridiculous.
— A. H. (@a_h_reaume) November 3, 2022
Musk is taking Twitter private, re-tooling with the help of his trusted aides from Tesla, and making it into a mostly subscription-based platform, which has displeased Tesla driver and Meghan Markle wanna-be Sandy Cortez.
Oddly, there was no comment from @Twitter, and the biggest story on the platform was not trending.
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