Toronto Identifies Public Enemy #1: Millennials with Plastic Coffee Cups

Starbucks image via Shutterstock

Until today, I only knew three things about Toronto: 1) It’s the fourth-largest city in North America, 2) Lots of American movies and TV shows film there because of the tax incentives, and 3) Mayor Rob Ford was a born entertainer and I miss him. But today I learned a fourth thing: Those darn millennials are walking all over Toronto holding takeout coffee cups, and it’s gotta stop.

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Brian Lilley, Toronto Sun:

Have you heard about the latest epidemic that the City of Toronto has to deal with?…

If you haven’t noticed the “epidemic,” Ward 8 Councillor Mike Colle certainly has.

“You know, I think it’s really an epidemic of these people wandering our streets with these coffee cups,” Colle told the city’s Infrastructure and Environment Committee.

That’s the obvious solution to a littering problem: a publicly funded educational program to tell millennials to sit down when they drink their coffee. Otherwise, how will they know that’s even an option?

I assume Toronto will go through with this, because that’s the Canadian way. U.S. cities led by Democrats, the Canadians of America, are already banning plastic straws and plastic grocery bags, and they’re going after plastic coffee cups next. They want to ban pretty much all plastics. They saw a viral video of a tortoise with a straw stuck in its nostril, and now they’ve decided that the whole of human progress is bad and nobody gets to enjoy it. Our beloved public officials need to ban all of the things.

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How can we have utopia if we don’t let meddling, busybody authoritarians tell us how to live our lives?

(Hat tip: Ed Driscoll)

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