Rather than accept his fate and take a seat next to his antediluvian chum, Don "Colonel Blimp" Lemon, at one of the three remaining Arthur Treacher's Fish & Chips, CNN has-been Jake Tapper refuses to admit that he is as relevant today as a new line of Kevin Federline-designed beepers.
FACT-O-RAMA! Before Dave Thomas created Wendy's, he helped lauch Arthur Treachers Fish & Chips. The company grew to 826 restaurants. Today, only three still exist, all of them fairly close to Cleveland.
By now, you are aware that President Donald Trump is having a new ballroom built at the White House, and you know that he isn't using taxpayer dollars to build it. But that hasn't kept the Trump Derangement Syndrome (TDS) undead harpies from screeching about it like brokenhearted howler monkeys, as likely directed to do so by the troglodytes from Operation Mockingbird.
The usual suspects have come forth to squeal their disdain about the ballroom, but Tapper is clinging to this non-story like a sad, tragic little barnacle-man.
Sure, the Facebook flunkies seem not to know, or not care, that the ballroom's $300 million-ish pricetag isn't being paid for with tax dollars, unlike the billions spent to feed, clothe, transport, house, and heal illegal immigrants, but hey, when did Democrats embrace any reality?
Jake Tapper knows, he’s just fanning the flames 🔥! Mullins straightened his butt out with the truth!
— Ava Grace (@AvaGrace9211) October 28, 2025
The ballroom doesn’t need Congress to allocate funds because the tax payers aren’t footing the bill!
He also knows it’s the democrats that are holding the country hostage! 🤦♀️ pic.twitter.com/hTlkZ4BoHX
I believe that "ballroom-gate" (wow, that sounds dumb) is yet another desperate smoke screen to cover two things: the Democrats' dismal Schumer Shutdown and Trump's parade of victories that the leftoids don't want to accept.
Every other day seems to bring record highs on Wall Street. Gas is cheaper than it's been since Trump's first term. Trump is signing prosperity-birthing deals in Asia, including for rare minerals. He is (checking my 1990s-era Trump watch) currently scheduled to meet with Xi Jinping, though that can change if Big Daddy Xi gets a bug up his rickshaw.
Trump's ICE agents have deported more than 500,000 illegal immigrants, and another 1.5 million have rethought their plans and gone home on their own.
Trump proved that Washington, D.C., once considered a killing ground, where up to 96% of murder victims are black, can be peaceful.
Trump has reduced 57 Venezuelan narco-terrorists to fish food as they tried to smuggle deadly fentanyl into our country.
As I am writing this, the feds just cut the interest rate by another quarter point on Wednesday. The future's so bright, we gotta wear shades.
As all of this is taking place, the only things the Democrats and their mopes can do is jump, jive, and wail over the construction of a long-overdue White House ballroom, to which they will never be invited.
FACT-O-RAMA! Democrats should be tickled that if they ever take over the White House again, their transgender decepticon dudes can desecrate it by flashing their man-boobs in an opulent, Trump-built ballroom rather than outside on the grass.
The Democrats' spleen-bursting fury over Trump's ballroom is nothing more than a sad attempt to cover their showdown folly and to keep We the People from enjoying life far more under Trump than under Biden.
BREAKING! Did Tapper finally wake up....?
Related: Jake Tapper Just Told the Truth, and Now I Need My Fainting Couch
And, finally, the Democrat ninnyhammers hate that for the next 100 years or so, the news will present stories about future presidents entertaining world leaders in what will likely be forever called "The Trump Ballroom."
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