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Everything Seemingly is Spinning Out of Control

"No, this is not a screaming herd of wild teenage girls awaiting the arrival of Justin Bieber or One Direction - this is Black Friday at a Victoria's Secret in Kansas... amazing that America has come to this."

ABC's Dan Harris described a similar 2012 Black Friday stampede as an "orgy of capitalism," an odd combination of pejoratives from a newsreader at a network that created Monday Night Football to sell commercial airtime at the highest premium possible, along with decades of sex-themed TV series ranging from Three's Company to Desperate Housewives.

However, if there's a silver-lining to such retail mayhem, here's a reminder that the underwear apocalypse could be always worse: "Last year, for the first time, sales of adult diapers in Japan exceeded those for babies."

Or as Mark Steyn wrote a few years ago: "What's the point of creating a secular utopia if it's only for one generation?"