Ed Driscoll

Chuck Schumer Morphed into Ralph Wiggum So Slowly...

Promotional art of "Starship" courtesy of SpaceX

“The founding fathers, in their wisdom, devised a method by which our republic can take one hundred of its most prominent numbskulls and keep them out of the private sector where they might do actual harm.”

P.J. O’Rourke.

At a Sunday press conference calling for stricter rules on concentrated laundry detergent pod packaging that some children have mistaken for candy, New York Democratic Sen. Charles Schumer admitted that even he has felt drawn to down a few detergent pods himself.

“The incidents are skyrocketing,” the New York Daily News reported Schumer said during a joint press conference with medical professionals. “These pods were supposed to make household chores easier, not tempt our children to swallow harmful chemicals. I saw one on my staffer’s desk and I wanted to eat it.”

“Schumer tempted to eat ‘delicious’ laundry detergent” — Caroline May, the Daily Caller, today. As Jim Treacher adds elsewhere at the Caller, “The only way to make them more attractive to Chuck Schumer would be to shape them like little TV cameras.”