Katie Suarez Saved Four Lives, but Her Family Still Lost Her

Katie Suarez called her father to say she was about half a mile from home, and when she didn’t arrive, her parents went looking for her.

Her father found her stabbed in the neck along the waterfront in Brooklyn.

Half a mile, a daughter out for a run, and a father expecting her home. Before considering anything else about her death, we need to sit and think about how ordinary those circumstances were.

Katie was 28, worked as a bank teller, and graduated from Brooklyn College. Someone attacked her on October 30 along the Shore Parkway Greenway.

Katie died on November 2, leaving a family whose private life has become a public story.

From People:

The nonprofit says that Suarez — a bank teller and graduate of Brooklyn College — was able to donate her heart, both kidneys, liver and pancreas. She also donated her corneas.

“This is an unimaginable loss for any parent and family. That Katie thought of others in being a registered donor is a powerful testament to her generosity and will ensure that she will live on through these gifts of life,” Leonard Achan, president and CEO of the nonprofit, said in a statement.

Now comes news of extraordinary generosity. There's no greater love than laying down one's life for one's friends. Katie is a shining example of Jesus' words.

Katie had registered as an organ donor; her heart, both kidneys, liver, and pancreas went to four recipients ranging in age from 12 to 75. Three live in New York; one lives in Florida. She also donated her corneas.

We should celebrate her decision. We should also resist the urge to make her death easier to bear by assigning it a purpose.

Four lives saved can’t balance the loss of a daughter. The recipients’ good fortune creates no obligation for Katie’s parents to feel better. Gratitude and grief can exist together, without either explaining away the other.

A person’s value doesn’t depend on what remains useful after death. Katie would’ve mattered just as much had donation been impossible. Remembering her means recognizing the full worth of the woman who should still be here, alongside the extraordinary consequence of a choice she made for others.

Katie made her choice before the attack, before strangers learned her name. She agreed to help people she would never meet. Her generosity belonged to her while she was alive.

Too often, a victim’s name becomes useful to everyone except the people who knew her. Politicians find an argument, commentators find a symbol, and the accused receives a biography, while the person who died gets reduced to an age, a photograph, and the circumstances of the killing.

We can do better.

We can remember Katie as someone who went to work, called her father, and made a decision that would eventually help strangers survive. None of those details require us to invent her thoughts or turn her into a saint.

Sayed Mohassib, 27, also a former New York City police officer, has been charged with murder and other offenses in connection with the attack. He pleaded not guilty and was ordered held without bail. Prosecutors must prove their case, and Katie’s family is entitled to a thorough accounting of what happened.

Justice and remembrance belong together. Honoring her gift doesn’t require setting aside the violence that ended her life. Demanding accountability doesn’t require making her entire identity the manner of her death.

Her decision also asks something of the rest of us. We spend enormous amounts of time announcing what we believe about humanity. Katie took a practical step to help another human being, and she received no thanks.

People willing to consider donation can have that conversation with their families now.

But even here, restraint matters. Her parents haven’t volunteered to become a lesson for the country. They owe the public neither inspiration nor a reassuring explanation of how they’re getting through.

Her funeral Mass is scheduled for November 12 at St. Simon & Jude Roman Catholic Church in Brooklyn. Burial follows at Green-Wood Cemetery.

Four people have received a chance to keep living because Katie chose to be a donor. Her family must still bury her. We can honor the hope she gave those strangers and leave room for the grief that no gift takes away.

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