Culture

Neiman Marcus Has Those $66 Frozen Collard Greens You Wanted

Yes, I was kidding.

Luxury department store Neiman Marcus is well-known for its opulent holiday offerings.

For example, its “Christmas Book” holiday gift guide is offering his-and-hers “Island cars” for $65,000 each. And a trip to castles in the U.K. for eight will set you back a cool $700,000.

But a different kind of item is now raising eyebrows: The department store is selling collard greens for $66, plus $15.50 in shipping. It advertises that the vegetable is “seasoned with just the right amount of spices and bacon” and “ships fully cooked and frozen.”

The comfort food’s high price tag has generated scorn and ridicule on the Internet. “I can’t even begin to imagine the conversation at the dinner table with my grandmother,” The Root said. “Do you know how many pounds of greens you could get for $66 at a grocery store? And, who’s cooking these greens? Is there some secret Neiman Marcus kitchen run by a grandmother or Paula Deen?”

As for the scorn and ridicule, I’m feeling a little contrarian on that count. As an avowed capitalist, I think any time you can get people to spend 66 bucks plus shipping for an easily obtained vegetable you have done something marvelous. Who are we to question what qualifies as a luxury item for people who have way too much money to spend?

Kudos to the marketing people at Nieman Marcus for thinking outside the box. Speaking of boxes, maybe they should bring back the old Pet Rock box, pair it with the collard greens and call it a retro dinner decoration.
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That’s got to be worth an extra c-note for anyone willing to drop the $66 on the collard greens, right?

If Nieman Marcus needs any more suggestions, I’ve got an imagination and high speed internet. I’ll be here all week.