Culture

Barnes & Noble Cancels 'Diverse Editions' Line After Being Accused of 'Blackface'

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Liberals, particularly white liberals, demand diversity in everything but thought. They can take one look at you and tell what you think and believe by the color of your skin. That’s because they’re not racists! Which is why I rejoiced when Barnes & Noble announced a new line of public-domain books that are cheap to publish classic literature, with a twist: black people on the covers, instead of those gross icky white racists we usually see.

I mean, think about it. How do you know Victor Frankenstein didn’t build his monster out of the corpses of black people who lived in 19th-century rural Switzerland? Isn’t it pretty racist to assume that Romeo and Juliet, two teenagers born to nobility in Renaissance Italy, weren’t black? This marketing idea just makes sense!

Or at least I thought so at the time. But now some people of color are angry about it, which means I need to defer to them because of my inferior race.

Hillel Italie, AP:

Barnes & Noble is withdrawing a planned line of famous literature reissued with multicultural cover images that has been met with widespread criticism on social media.

“We acknowledge the voices who have expressed concerns about the Diverse Editions project at our Barnes & Noble Fifth Avenue store and have decided to suspend the initiative,” Barnes & Noble announced in a statement Wednesday.

The author Adriana Herrera had called the books, scheduled to be launched this week, “the classics in blackface.”

Well, you certainly don’t want to do anything that makes people angry on social media. They might say you’re being racist, a very rare accusation.

Now, this isn’t to say it’s impossible to update the classics in a way that’s more meaningful to the young people of today. We should all take a page from the makers of the classic 1972 film Blacula:

See? It is possible to improve a timeless work of literature, showing taste and sensitivity toward the issue of race while preserving the spirit and themes of the original work. You just need to educate yourself and check your privilege and other phrases.

Better luck next time, whiteys!