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If Biden's Agents Come to My Door to Ask If I've Accepted the Vaccine, Here's How I'll Answer

AP Photo/Andrew Harnik

The Biden administration pronounced earlier this week that it will start going door to door to get more Americans vaccinated against the Wuhan virus. A lot was made of this notion. The response to the pandemic has created all sorts of despotic impulses that have constituted a full-frontal assault on American liberty, and this just demonstrates how the Left, as “personified” in Joe Biden, just can’t quit tyranny. I moved DEEP into the country to avoid this kind of imperial entanglements, to paraphrase Obi Wan Kenobi. As the oligarchic Biden Left continues to push the Overton Window further toward communism, liberty-loving Americans likely had a similarly defiant, get-off-my-lawn gut reaction to the idea of Joe Biden and Jen Psaki violating our medical privacy and property rights to come evangelize in favor of big government.

I know I did. But then I thought it through a bit further.

As an American with unalienable rights, I can engage in free expression, gather more information, and hold my government accountable. So, instead of taking a No Soliciting or We Don’t Call 9-1-1 approach, I’ve decided I’ll take an approach of Smile, You’re On Camera.

If I receive a visitor from the government who, after all, is only trying to help, I’ll be sure to offer them a cup of coffee or a glass of iced tea. I’ll also let them know that the cameras will roll. As a public agent on private property, they shouldn’t have much of an expectation of privacy, and anyway, they’re doing the good work of the government, so they have nothing to hide.

This is an old rule of thumb I learned when interacting with the media. I presume these government agents will have body cams, or some sort of recording equipment, to ensure their own security (or to set up the most egregious conspiracy theorists to go viral on YouTube). When in an interview situation where the other party is recording, you always want to have your own camera, just in case they have to edit out something important, or that doesn’t make you look as dumb as they’re trying to make you appear.

Related: COVID-19 Vaccines Are Not the Right Choice for Everyone—for Increasingly Obvious Reasons

I’ll also be sure to get the first and last name of the visitor(s). As the friendly sort, I’ll be very curious if they’re a member of my community. I’m always looking to make new friends, and I am always curious to know how someone lands a sweet gig like this.

Speaking of curiosity, I can’t help but to want to know how they could target those who have yet to receive the vaccine. That could only happen, in my estimation, if the federal government violated its own laws protecting individual medical privacy. Also, who else is on the list? That’s public information, right? Tell me who you’re targeting next, so I can tell them what a good time this is.

If the conversation lasts this long, I suppose the agents will eventually ask me why I haven’t taken the vaccine. At this point, I will ask them how they know I haven’t received natural inoculation—how do they know I haven’t already had the infection? An increasing number of studies indicate natural inoculation is far superior for creating immunity than the vaccine. Why should I take a vaccine if I already have antibodies? I will be happy to share the copious data indicating a lack of efficacy, significant side effects, and legitimate concerns about the government downplaying the efficacy of the therapeutics that shall not be named. Why won’t the feds recommend inexpensive therapeutics that effectively treat this disease?

Related: When Will the ‘Experts’ Stop Pretending Natural Immunity Doesn’t Exist in Recovered COVID-19 Patients?

Then again, I may just point out how this whole conversation is moot. I could ask the agent(s) to point to the part of the United States Constitution that allows any of this activity on behalf of the federal government. Far be it from me to be inhospitable, but I might have to insist that they have violated my unalienable rights simply by using my tax dollars to invade my privacy like this.

In fact, now that I think about it, I could engage them in a lengthy discourse regarding the Constitution and how their bosses have violated it. I suspect they would deeply appreciate the education, given the general lack of civics literacy in America. They may even thank me for teaching them things they never knew about the enumerated rights of government, the Bill of Rights, and the Declaration of Independence. We could get really in depth about how such a visit from federal agents violates my rights to due process and privacy, my rights against unreasonable searches and testifying against my own interests, and how all rights not granted to the government in the Constitution are reserved to the people and the states in the Ninth and Tenth Amendments, respectively.

Heck, if they overstay their welcome, I could engage in a conversation about the Third Amendment. The possibilities are endless.

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If all that doesn’t bear fruit, I might just ask them if they’ve accepted their Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, into their hearts, instead of the false god of big government. Blind faith and false idols and all that.

Seems like an appropriate conclusion for a conversation with door-to-door evangelists, doesn’t it?