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December 31st, 2013 - 8:14 am


More, in case the headline didn’t convey the full thrust of the story:

When police arrived at a building on the corner of S.W. 15th Ave. and S.W. Yamhill on Saturday, they found a naked man standing on the ledge, cutting himself and threatening to jump.

Sergeant Drake Hull who was one of the first officers on the scene, said the man was occasionally tripping and barely coherent as he walked on a 24-inch ledge.

An officer trained in crisis-intervention began talking to the man, who said he was hungry. Police then procured French fries and a turkey and bacon sandwich from the nearby Hotel deLuxe. The man apparently wasn’t overwhelmed when presented with the sandwich.

Hull said, “I think at one point he said he wanted a cheeseburger, but beggars can’t be choosers.” Police were eventually able to convince the would-be jumper to walk away from the ledge and eat.

I’d have held out for some Lion’s Choice.

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All Comments   (4)
All Comments   (4)
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As the bumper stickers say, keep Portland weird.
49 weeks ago
49 weeks ago Link To Comment
he should have held out for a bacon cheeseburger.
50 weeks ago
50 weeks ago Link To Comment
Oh, man. Bacon, turkey, mayo, tomato, lettuce? I'd definitely not kill myself for one of those!! A turkey sandwich is the reason God invented mayo.
50 weeks ago
50 weeks ago Link To Comment
Key word in there is "bacon." Bacon has the power to ward off suicide.
50 weeks ago
50 weeks ago Link To Comment
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