In the Army

So much for defending American interests overseas:

The U.S. military has asked South Korea to ban lap dancing and other lewd acts at local nightclubs near its bases, saying they negatively impact military discipline.

The officials said the military was taking similar steps at other bases in the United States and overseas against lap dancing.

The U.S. Army’s 2nd Infantry Division, which has 15,000 troops near the border with North Korea, recently sent letters to the South Korean Special Tourist Association and local mayors urging a crack down on lap dancing clubs near barracks.

Do we expect our military to perform when they can’t even relax with a little lapdance after hours?

Seriously though (OK, so I’ve only been half-kidding so far), the funniest part of the story is the Pentagonese for “lapdance” is “client-focused exotic dancing.”

And the Pentagon version costs $250.