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The PJ Tatler

by
Bryan Preston

Bio

April 22, 2014 - 3:47 pm

In the left corner, we have the President of the United States, the most powerful man in the world, Barack Obama. He’s a youthful 52 years old, clearly up on the latest music and cultural trends, does his NCAA March Madness brackets with an amazing consistency, and weighs in on just about every issue there is. The man knows Beyoncé, fercryinoutloud.

In the right corner, a pair of size 12 (approximate) hand-made, sesame Italian loaf breadshoes. They’re edible, so I suppose you could stuff condiments and lunch meat into them and turn them into a sammich. Or wear them around the house, as long as you don’t have cats or dogs around.

This (minus the celebrity soccer player on the right).

showbiz_obama_beckham

Versus this.

breadshoe

 

Well, the team behind a secretive but cool-sounding, yet-to-be-launched app called Ratify is running a contest.

On the first day of the contest, the team announced that it was giving away a trip for two to Silicon Valley to meet President Barack Obama on May 8th.

On the second day, the team announced that it was throwing a curve: The winner could pick the trip to meet the president, or they could opt for a pair of breadshoes.

Promo for the contest has been minimal, according to an insider at Ratify: “I paid a guy $5 to tweet about it yesterday,” the insider told me in email.

Our source’s numbers reveal a couple of bad omens for Obama and the Democrats. Day one of the contest saw little interest and very few sign-ups — just 20 sign-ups to meet POTUS from 500 visitors.

Day two, though, after breadshoes became a possible prize, traffic took off. Of the approximately 2,000 visitors who took at look at the contest on the second day, 100 signed up.

“That gives us 5x conversions and 4x audience multipliers, due solely to breadshoes!” our insider noted.

The insider also notes that Ratify has seen a 300% increase in sign-ups from San Francisco, not exactly GOP territory. They’re going for the breadshoes, too.

And now, I’m hungry.

Bryan Preston has been a leading conservative blogger and opinionator since founding his first blog in 2001. Bryan is a military veteran, worked for NASA, was a founding blogger and producer at Hot Air, was producer of the Laura Ingraham Show and, most recently before joining PJM, was Communications Director of the Republican Party of Texas.

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Top Rated Comments   
Well, they're both incredibly stupid and useless, but at least the breadshoes won't endanger your liberties and your bank account as well.
26 weeks ago
26 weeks ago Link To Comment
Definitely the breadshoes.
26 weeks ago
26 weeks ago Link To Comment
Can I wear the breadshoes to the meeting with the President?
26 weeks ago
26 weeks ago Link To Comment
All Comments   (6)
All Comments   (6)
Sort: Newest Oldest Top Rated
Personally I'd rather sleep on a bed of nails or walk over a bed of hot coals then have anything to do with Prince Barry. But that's just me. So I'd opt for the breadshoes.
25 weeks ago
25 weeks ago Link To Comment
Now thet raht thar is funny, ah don' keer HOO you are!


26 weeks ago
26 weeks ago Link To Comment
Well, they're both incredibly stupid and useless, but at least the breadshoes won't endanger your liberties and your bank account as well.
26 weeks ago
26 weeks ago Link To Comment
Here in San Francisco, our breadshoes are sourdough.
26 weeks ago
26 weeks ago Link To Comment
Definitely the breadshoes.
26 weeks ago
26 weeks ago Link To Comment
Can I wear the breadshoes to the meeting with the President?
26 weeks ago
26 weeks ago Link To Comment
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