The International Society of Camelid Research and Development, which studies camels, objected to proposals to cull thousands of wild, farting camels in Australia’s outback to prevent an increase in Greenhouse Gases.
PARIS — The world’s association of camel scientists fought back angrily on Monday over Australian plans to kill wild dromedaries on the grounds that their flatulence adds to global warming. … The kill-a-camel suggestion is floated in a paper distributed by Australia’s Department of Climate Change and Energy Efficiency, as part of consultations for reducing the country’s carbon footprint.
There are about 1.2 million wild camels in Australia. In the meantime, tens of thousands of animals are going to be shot by Australian ranchers after the Gillard government banned the export of live cattle to Indonesia in response to concerns by animal welfare advocates over slaughterhouse procedures in that country.
Nico Botha, who owns the Moola Bulla Station near Halls Creek in the far north of Western Australia, was told to reduce his herd of 25,000 cattle when he bought the station six months ago.
The cattle were going to be sold to Indonesia but Mr Botha says he is being forced to cull his livestock in light of the live export ban.
Australia’s live cattle trade with Indonesia was suspended last month after public outrage at footage of cruelty to cattle in some Indonesian abattoirs.
According to the Sydney Morning Herald “the grazier, Nico Botha, said he needed to cull his herd by 3000 and had no option but to start shooting 200 cattle a day, worth $120,000. He could not sell them and did not have enough pasture to feed them.”
Not to kill the cattle would create an environmental disaster. According to the Age the “cattle would starve to death because of overgrazing and it was too expensive to transport them within Australia.” But to kill them might also create an environmental catastrophe as the thousands of carcasses would have to be safely disposed of.
Don't Let That Smile Fool You. It's a Climate Denier.
The Guardian describes the benefits of going out and shooting a camel. “Australia’s population of wild camels, the Financial Times reveals, may soon be shot in order to earn carbon credits under the country’s forthcoming emissions trading scheme. Each one of the creatures is estimated to produce a tonne of carbon dioxide a year – about the same as a 7,000km flight – not to mention the environmental havoc they cause in a fragile desert landscape more suited to amiable marsupials.” Alternatives have been considered, such as feeding the camels birth-control tablets, but there are doubts whether this would work.
That means that more drastic measures may have to be employed in order to keep the environmentalists and animal welfare advocates happy. The following video showcases the perfect tool for preventing camels and cars from creating Global Warming. Who knows? We may soon see it in use. Nothing is too strange to conceive of these days.
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It’s not really about lowering greenhouse gasses at all is it? The notion that camel farts have any impact on greenhouse emissions or “climate change” is a spectacular failure of quantitative analysis.
What it’s really about is a house-of-cards carbon credit scheme, one of the things that helped bring down Enron, as I recall.
Scams, schemes and frauds, hiding behind flimsy science worthy of mid-IQ middle-schoolers.
This is a case of “wetlands good, animal farts bad”. Greenies love wetlands because they are active ecospheres where competition is ongoing and biodiversity is high. Wet, saturated soils have one drawback – they are methane factories. Easterbrook provided estimates in 1995 that, owing to the natural decomposition of organic matter, global (good) wetlands emitted about 115 million tons of methane per year. At that time the world’s (bad) cattle were the source of about 60 million tons of methane per year. Wetlands were producing about twice the methane that the best efforts of all those farting cows could release into the air.
Greenies decry out of one side of their mouths, that cow and camel farts are an outrage. Simultaneously, out of the other side of their mouths, greenies cry out that the world needs more wetlands.
Either methane emissions from live stock are an outrage or the world needs more wetlands. The two things cannot be true at the same time.
Ahhh … the law of unintentioned consequeces. It’ll be fun, watching the contortions of the bureaucrats, as they attempt to wriggle free of the iron teeth, caught between their rules and the awful publicity resulting from them.
More popcorn, please. This might be amusing.
#2 westerncanadian
This is a case of “wetlands good, animal farts bad”.
Wait until the Greenies find out that domestic pets are responsible for enough intestinal gas emission to require attention from the veterinary community:
“Flatulence: 13 Ways to Fight the Fumes”
“It’s no secret when Rex passes gas. But he can’t help being a four-pawed faux pas. After all, intestinal gas is a natural part of digestion. ‘It’s just that some animals produce more than others,’ says William D. Fortney, D.V.M., assistant professor of small animal medicine in the Department of Clinical Sciences at the Kansas State University College of Veterinary Medicine in Manhattan, Kansas.
Cats are also prone to flatulence, although their diets and eating habits tend to make them less gassy than dogs. ‘Besides, there’s a big difference between a flatulent little cat and a flatulent 80-pound dog,’ says Dr. Fortney.
No matter the perpetrator, flatulence is an ill wind that blows no good. So if you find yourself crying foul when your pet’s around . . . ”
The 13 tips are here:
http://www.petsmart.com/uc/petarticles_db.jsp?ucCategory=ARTICLE&ucTopic=CAT&ucSubTopic=HEALTH&ucSubTopic2=&ucContent=/articles/content/dog_cat/health/flatulence/230.html
Dare we ask how much methane is produced by Bo the First Dog? And are the enviros prepared to euthanize their cats and dogs as a sacrifice to Gaia’s demands? “First they came for the wild camels . . . “
“Public outcry over cruelty to cattle in Indonesian slaughterhouses”‘ I wonder what percentage of the public was actually out crying about it? I wonder what happened to the sensitivity for the Muslim culture in Indonesia? Will Indonesian diplomats protest? Will goods from Australia be boycotted? Most of all I wonder who profits? Where is Al Gore? He could probably devour a lot of camel carcasses.
“Will the insanity never stop?
Skeptic: “You’re worried about camel flatulence. How far will you go?”
Whackjob: “I’d walk a mile to shoot a camel.”
Skeptic: [loudly break forth wind] “So, am I next?”
It occurs to me there is something more horrible than the Ministry of Love of “1984″, i.e. the fart police. They’ll be armed with methane detectors and search for those guilty of fart-crime, e.g. eating too much chilli, bean burritos or sour cream onion dip. When you least anticipate it (sometime at night while you’re secretly munching a tamale), the fart police will kick in your door and haul you off in chains, with the half-eaten tamale as evidence.
So instead of goring oxen
It is camels being Gored
As the carbon Nazis try to save the Earth
From the flatulence of camels
Who just fart because they’re bored
And who’ve farted since the moment of their birth
But if shooting all the farters
Is the plan to cleanse the air
Then they’ve got to line us all against the wall
For we’ve all been known to loose one
So we really must be fair
If they’re gonna kill the farters, kill us all
#7 Eggplant
It occurs to me there is something more horrible than the Ministry of Love of “1984″, i.e. the fart police.
Lest we forget: the classic tribute to the therapeutic release of flatus in trench warfare, from Erich Maria Remarque’s All Quiet on the Western Front (1929):
“We have settled ourselves on the sunny side of the hut. There is a smell of tar, of summer, and of sweaty feet. Kat sits beside me. He likes to talk. Today we have done an hour’s saluting drill because Tjaden failed to salute a major smartly enough. Kat can’t get it out of his head.
‘You take it from me, we are losing the war because we can salute too well,’ he says.
Kropp stalks up, with his breeches rolled up and his feet bare. He lays out his washed socks to dry on the grass. Kat turns his eyes to heaven, lets off a mighty fart, and says meditatively: ‘Every little bean must be heard as well as seen.’”
For those who haven’t read Remarque’s novel, the English translation in full can be found here: http://www.plutocracycaust.org/w-en.html
when do we start actively ignoring and mocking these global idiots?
Where is PETA ?
Looking at the opening picture of the video, I thought it was going to be about a bunch of camels lighting farts. They could use them as targets for drone practice.
Why not keep them in a big tent, and collect the gas?
Why doesn’t someone just develop a strain of low-methane cattle? That can’t be that hard to do!!
“The world’s association of camel scientists ”
Did the scientists have one hump or two?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XaPZZJVDx6Y
Well I assume that just like rioting “youths” in Europe who have no discernible cultural essence, this cruel animal treatment — which I do not doubt for a moment is quite cruel indeed — is directly related to Halal butchering, but none of the articles dare mention it. No wonder the Indonesians are “angry.” Another day, another offended Muslim. Ho hum.
What I don’t get is why the Aussie rancher “can’t sell” his cattle. What, even at a reduced rate? He can’t get, say, half price for them somehow? And how is it too expensive to ship them within Australia but not too expensive to ship them to Indonesia? What I don’t know about cattle ranching in Australia can and has filled many books, but it just seems odd that the only resort is to kill them.
14. Peterike
“…it just seems odd that the only resort is to kill them.” without eating them.
Hearken back to days of yore when doctors were endorsing brands of cigarettes on TV.
Did you know that 90% of doctors who switched to Camels went back to women?
15. Bob Murphy
Based upon his location and the need to cull…
I’d guess that his entire herd is range fed — maybe even free range.
The market in Sydney may well be skewed towards corn-fed cattle.
The cost of trucking 3,000 head across Australia is likely to be brutal.
I suspect that the entire rationale for his operation is exportation to the muslim islands.
He’s not set up to ship cattle competitively by sea to Sydney, or any other native port, thence to the slaughter.
> This is a case of “wetlands good, animal farts bad”. Greenies love
> wetlands because they are active ecospheres where competition is
> ongoing and biodiversity is high Wet, saturated soils have one
drawback – they are methane factories
Clearly the only way to save the planet is to pave paradise and put up a parking lot.
Have we reached the level of farce yet?
I’d say that the entire “climate change” movement is a spectacular failure of quantitative analysis.
It’s as if to say that we must outlaw peeing in the ocean, as that contributes to the destructive force of tsunamis. Hey, every molecule counts. By all means, drive 20 miles to the recycling center to drop off your five pounds of newspaper. It’s a religion, after all, and God smiles on even the smallest of whispered prayers.
My guess is that the Ozian Camel Butchers Association started this. Why not ship fresh frozen camel carcasses? The position of the Climate Advocates, who are like Community Organizers only without any complicated people to have any responsibility for, prefering wetlands to cattle is telling. They identify with processes over living creatures. If there is a choice between two organic systems they pick the least sentient. Perhaps this feeds their fantasy of playing God.
What’s the problem?
Fresh grass-fed beef, lightly spiced and dried (maybe smoked, as well).
Package appropritely, and market as beef jerky (N. America), aka biltong (S. Africa).
Tasty.
“Either methane emissions from live stock are an outrage or the world needs more wetlands. The two things cannot be true at the same time.”
They can if you are a watermelon! Time for a new bumper sticker;
“Save a Camel. Shoot a liberal.”
This reminds me of a good fart story.
Judi Dench was talking about taking the role of Queen Elizabeth I in the
movie “Shakespeare in love.” Dench said you had to love the queen’s sense
of humor. For example — one of her courtiers cut a tremendous fart when
he bowed to her in the throne room. Mortified, he left the court hastily
and stayed away for several YEARS. When he finally reappeared, she spotted
him right away and called out to him, “Sir, the Fart is Forgot.”
you gotta love her
As for the people with gummy minds who think that camel farts are going to be the death of us, well, I’m speechless.
I think we should do a “cruelty to camels” shoot like the baby seals campaign, but cast the Eco-Nazis, appropriately, as the murderers. See if they can worm their way out of that one.
17. Blert
There are hardly any abattoirs left in Australia, Blert and that is the real problem Oz is having with the cattle.
Once dead, dressed and frozen transport becomes manageable.
The North of Western Australia has lots of little ports where small ships from Indonesia ply their trade. Ports such as Wyndham, near Kununurra and the gigantic Ord River Project. Darwin port also has a lot of local shipping to Indonesia. It’s amazing to watch. The triple trailer livestock road-trains drive straight into the ports and those cattle are ornery half-wild beasts. Very strong and not used to humans.
I think Australia could have handled the issue of humane killing without cutting the Indonesians beef supplies off like that.
I used to drive road-trains up there (not livestock) and you could pick up more Indonesian radio stations than Australian. They’re not far away.
The camels should have been culled long ago, never mind the global whatsits, those critters are nothing but extra large, extra ugly goats that trample and/or eat everything they come across. It’s one of the few eco nut campaign that actually has merit…[1]
As for not sending cattle to be slaughtered painfully, well that was about time that this happened, and btw, the Egyptian islamic clergy did publish a fatwa long ago, stating that stunned meat is acceptable, so, there is no reason for anyone to not stun.
Besides that, the resulting meat from unstunned slaughter is saturated with stress hormones and other unwholesome substances, and the carcass doesn’t bleed out properly either.
So, all in all, producing cattle for this kind of market is not really a business that any decent folks get involved in(just like decent people don’t become pimps, even when it’s legal where they live), there are better and more constructive ways of earning money out there.
[1] That’s always their trick, pick something that is reasonable and should have long ago been done and then use this as a smokescreen to sell the gullible kids their other crazy rubbish, since they were ‘seen to right’ on that particular topic, the rest of what they claim also will be ‘right’.
Greenies fart too. If we want to truly solve the global warming, climate change, climate disruption, whatever, problem, just shoot the Greenies. PROBLEM SOLVED!!!
Speaking of flatus, many years ago a friend told me one of his professors said there was an unpublished piece by Twain in which QE I, Walter Raleigh, and a couple of others had this ribald farting contest.
I’ve never been able to confirm this—can any of you, fellow BCers?
Gordon#27 – Why, yes indeedy. I believe one of my college english proffs said pretty much the same. Here’s a link to the whole thing at Project Gutenburg.
It’s called “1601″, if the link decays.
http://www.gutenberg.org/files/3190/3190-h/3190-h.htm
I live to serve…
This will be a tremendous help to my efforts to ban the consumption of beans and cabbage world-wide. However, it might be mis-used by some as a call for the extermination of the people of Mexico and India (although it would reduce world population by 20%).
If these emotionally retarded fools are not checked, man will be feeding on man before they’re through. They are the modern equivalent of the bubonic plague and will lay waste to huge tracts of civilization. Political correctness is akin to wearing a hollow beaked mask stuffed with herbs, I only hope someone is taking notes so that a future Jenner can recognize the onset before epedimic proportions and kill the infestation while they still have time.
Here’s what I love about so many of the “warmists” and rabid enviro-weenies: They’re Vegans. Vegans fart more copiously than omnivores (omnivory is natural for the human digestive system, veganism is not).
We need to put a bounty on vegans to save the planet. Incidentally, I imagine that vegans make for good eating.
#28—well done, Sgt, a good NCO always comes through, as through all military eternity.
An environmentalist is not a person who wants to solve problems, he is a person who wants to be a problem. Between the camels, which I concede are loathsome beasts, and the environmentalists, I think that we should spare the camels and shoot an equal body weight of environmentalists.