‘Any Man Over 30 Who Still Lives with a Roommate is Simply Afraid to Give Up His College Lifestyle’
4 Ways to Know You’re Dating a ‘Man-Boy’, Not a Man | Love + Sex – Yahoo! Shine:
So you’ve met this great man who seems like a lot of fun, but you can’t help having doubts. “God, I hope that this guy is a man and not the dreaded man-boy,” you think to yourself. You know how man-boys are: they’re the guys who show up on dates, dressed a little on the boyish side. Maybe he wore jeans that were a tad outdated. Maybe he sported a pair of running shoes on his feet. Or perhaps he actually wore a ball cap on a lunch date. It’s always fun at first, but if you overlook it, you’ll find that a month into the relationship, he’s still drinking with buddies every Saturday night instead of spending time being romantic with you. No one wants to end up there, so here are some ways to tell you’re dating a man-boy:
1. He has roommates past the age of 30: Any man over 30 who still lives with a roommate is simply afraid to give up his college lifestyle. He still likes the idea of living in a mini-fraternity: even without all of his friends, he still has a brotherhood of at least one. He might say he’s just saving money, but it’s more likely that he doesn’t want to grow up, which will keep him from important parts of adult life like commitment.
I sympathize with the general sentiments of this piece — a bunch of so-called men today are embarrassments still stuck in a Frat House mentality — but is the above injunction against roommates after 30 too much? Just having roomates after 30 doesn’t automatically make one a man-child, or does it?
It can also be a sign of not making enough money and living in the big city, which are also red flags but not necessarily the same red flags.
I’d say it’s a sign of living under Obamunism.
People live with roommates mostly because they can’t afford to live alone. I had my own apartment in college, now I share a place, because I can’t afford the alternative. Welcome to Chicago, home of our fearless leader.
Right on about the money issue, but women in big cities are used to see guys in that situation, aren’t they?
One might also have housemates because the Supreme Soviet has decided that only houses must be built, not flats. I am talking about the UK, not the Soviet Union; though perhaps the situation has changed since I left: I hear that lots of flats were built in Britain at the peak of the housing bubble. When I was there, even some professional couples over 40 were sharing (letting 1 or 2 rooms in their house to help pay the mortgage).
One might also have flatmates/housemates because the Supreme Soviet has made it unprofitable or illegal for real estate agents to deal in the rental market; so if you are in the country on a fixed term contract you have to know someone who knows someone. After this experience, if your employer offers an extension or a full job, you might be tempted to leave the country anyway. This is/was the case in Denmark, and to some extent the UK. It used to be the case in Netherlands, but it changed for the better in the 1990s.
No, it does not.
Some men are unable to afford to live where their careers dictate that they must live without a second income in the house. Some have significant physical problems that make it unwise to live alone. And some simply need to have someone else around, whether to care about, to provide occasional feedback, or just for background noise.
Notions about post-collegiate frat-boy party houses disappear quickly when you realize you have to work, and work hard, five days per week, just to keep bread on the table and a roof overhead. That doesn’t mean going it alone is optimal, or even possible. Not all young men are capable of living alone successfully. Even for a young man without handicaps, without social hangups, and with plenty of involvements, it can cause a serious emotional drain — and not all such young men can swiftly find a female partner suitable for marriage, as pretty as it might be to think so.
Only five??
Americans usually manage it in five days. I won’t speak for Canadians.
No successful person I know works five days a week. If you run your own business then you are working seven days a week.
That’s true in the US and Canada.
Even if they have a 5-day-a-week job they do other revenue generating things in the evenings and weekends.
Note that I said successful. Working five days a week is one reason the losers still can’t afford a life without roommates.
See how it works?
Get off the high horse – almost all corporate IT jobs are 5 day affairs. You’ll work enough in those 5 days to need the days off, which are also needed to read about the next technologies coming and learn that new programming language.
Then either:
1. We have radically different definitions for successful; or:
2. You don’t know very many successful people.
(Full disclosure: I work five days a week, and consider myself successful. I know other successful people who work five days a week, who also consider themselves successful. None of us are related by blood, are married to one another, or owe any of the others money. This is not an offer to make you successful, which can only be made by formal prospectus. No successful people (or Canadians) were harmed in the making of this comment. We are an Equal Opportunity Offender.)
By Jove, Watson! The blighter just called me a Man-Boy!
If you like working for somebody else who could fire you at any time, that’s great!
No one ever got rich working for somebody else.
Of course, not everybody cares about “rich.” But if you work at a “corporate IT job” you… CAN AFFORD NOT TO HAVE A ROOMMATE.
Which is what we were talking about.
THe view from my high horse is awesome, except for the tiresome cliches I occasionally have to swat away.
Ah, so you equate successful with rich. Now I see. But tell us, please: What’s your lower bound on rich?
Except for three years in the mid-Eighties, I’ve always worked for someone else. My current net worth qualifies me as rich by most Americans’ standards, though perhaps not by yours. But I’ve regarded myself as successful for more than thirty years, because I stand at the pinnacle of my trade and have the respect of everyone I’ve worked with.
So you see, there are at least two approaches to success, and probably more. I suggest you climb down off your horse now and then, and make the acquaintance of a few more people. It might help to broaden your worldview.