The 10 Biggest Failures Of 2011
10. The Walking Dead: Season 2: The first season of The Walking Dead was the best thing to happen to sci-fi fans since Buffy the Vampire Slayer went off the air. People loved the series so much that the second season premiere set a ratings record. Unfortunately, it was all downhill from there. A group of disparate people desperately trying to escape hordes of zombies is exciting. A group of disparate people hashing out their feelings about each other on a relatively safe farm while they venture out to put down the occasional stray zombie they run across is not. At this point, the show is like a relationship that’s going bad. It starts out magnificently, but then you slowly realize it’s not as much fun as it used to be, but you’re still hoping against hope that things will turn around before you have to break it off. If the Walking Dead keeps this up, a lot of its fans are going to have a “It’s not you, baby, it’s me” conversation with the show.
9. Righthaven: Righthaven is a group of “copyright trolls” that have been the scourge of bloggers and forums across the world. Its modus operandi is to buy the right to stories from various newspapers and then use a loophole in the law to sue anybody and everybody it can for “copyright infringement.” There are no requests to take the material down, no harm done to the papers, just demands for ridiculous cash sums under dubious legal circumstances. After profitably settling a number of cases, Righthaven started losing in court. Happily, things have gotten so bad that “$225,000 in attorney fee awards have been assessed against Righthaven. Righthaven has pleaded poverty and said that it may be forced to file for bankruptcy, but the court in the Hoehn case issued an order allowing the seizure of Righthaven’s assets to satisfy the award.” Personally, I’m rooting for everyone associated with Righthaven to end up eating out of garbage cans. It couldn’t happen to nicer guys.
(Update: Righthaven’s URL is being auctioned off here. Bidders are expected to be mostly defendants trying to keep the Righthaven name and everything about it out of circulation. — Ed Driscoll.)
8. Greg Mortenson: Three cups of fraud: The best-selling author of Three Cups of Tea not only managed to pocket a lot of money off his book, he started doing charity work via the Central Asia Institute. He was building schools for girls in Afghanistan and Pakistan, which sounds wonderful. Unfortunately, that heartwarming story turned into a cautionary tale after it was revealed that Mortenson made up things in the book, greatly exaggerated what was being done, and used the charity as a personal ATM machine. Although Mortenson has done some good, he also misled a lot of people, including Barack Obama who gave the $100,000 that he received from his Nobel Prize to the Central Asia Institute. Come to think of it, that may be the most responsible that Obama has been with money since he came to D.C.; so perhaps we shouldn’t be too critical.
7. Doomsday prophet Harold Camping: Camping made the ultimate mistake for a doomsday-predicting crank: He actually gave people a date. You would think he’d learned his lesson after blowing it in 1994, but he tried it again for May of 2011. There was a huge advertising campaign, signs, and lots of publicity. I actually asked a couple of people in D.C. holding signs that referenced the May Rapture what was going to happen when the date passed and nothing happened. They dodged the question, which turned out to be a good move. After that Rapture prediction failed, Camping AGAIN predicted the Rapture for October of this year, which you may have guessed was wrong by the fact that you’re reading this column in December. All of this would just merit excessive eye-rolling except for the fact that a number of Camping’s followers sold all their belongings and gave him money to spread the word. If there’s anybody who was genuinely sad that the world didn’t end, they’re probably the ones.
6. Qwikster: In the face of powerful competition from Redbox, Netflix came up with Qwikster, the “new Coke” of the video world. The idea was that Netflix would split off its streaming video service from its DVD delivery service, but the idea was received with all the enthusiasm of a smallpox epidemic. Customers hated having a large price increase combined with having to go to two websites to get the same service they were already receiving at Netflix — and come to think of it, who wouldn’t hate that? In a sense, this is actually a move DUMBER than “New Coke” because at least that was a new product, while this is just splitting Netflix in a way that is all downside for its existing customer base.
5. Charlie Sheen: He’s pumping tiger blood, man! He’s winning! He’s a rock star from Mars! He’ll make your face melt off! Wheeeeee! Go to his live shows! Give him a new TV show! This guy is really exciting now! Cheer him on!
That’s in front of the cameras. Behind the cameras, here’s what it’s like:
“You can’t do that much cocaine and work. I didn’t want to be writing a sitcom while my friend died. Or worse, hurt someone else. We couldn’t be complacent. There was a tragedy unfolding right in front of us. There was violence and blackouts. On a certain level, if you’re looking the other way, you’re responsible. It was falling apart. It was heartbreaking to be around here then.” — Chuck Lorre on firing Charlie Sheen from Two and a Half Men
We’ve already seen how this movie turns out. It’s called “Amy Winehouse.”
The same people who were laughing and cheering her on when she sang ”They tried to make me go to rehab, I said, ‘no, no, no’” were the ones making jokes about her after she died. That’s Charlie Sheen’s future unless something changes, and it’s not pretty for him or his “fans.”
4. Casey Anthony: A total unknown became the third most Googled name in 2011 by being a hot party girl who people believe got away with “OJing” her daughter. This is actually more than a little ironic when Planned Parenthood exists, but the world is what it is. Of course, the really sad thing is that Anthony will probably parlay this whole experience into wealth and maybe even a starring slot on some D-list celebrity reality show.
3. The Kim Kardashian/Kris Humphries Wedding: This may be the only wedding in history where the marriage didn’t last as long as the TV promos foisting it on the public. In fact, the whole marriage actually imploded so quickly that it spurred allegations that it was all staged just to rake in a massive reality TV payday. That seems improbable, but not impossible — which says a lot about everyone involved. Whatever the case may be, we have found out that money really doesn’t buy you class — or sanity, or happiness, or a likable personality. Who’d have ever thought such things about someone who originally became famous for being friends with Paris Hilton?
2. The Penn State Pedophilia Scandal: The very existence of pedophiles is troubling enough as it is, but what’s worse is finding out that there are apparently lots of people who’re willing to turn a blind eye to protect their jobs, avoid rocking the boat, or just to safeguard the cherished image of Penn State football. Here’s a quick piece of advice: If you run across anyone who’s being raped, don’t call your dad, don’t file a report, don’t have a polite chat with them about it later, CALL THE @%#$^&! police! Apparently, this is advice that grown men working for a university have not heard before now, which is a shame, because their silence helped a pedophile get away with raping children for years.
1. The Occupy Movement: Although this isn’t really a political list, it seems fair to include the Occupy Movement since it’s not an effective political movement in any sort of meaningful sense. If it is, how is it that no one even knows what they want to to accomplish? Even the people protesting don’t seem to know why they’re there. So, all they’ve ended up doing is recreating the Paleolithic era with a bunch of dirty, disheveled hippies, anarchists, and homeless people camping out in the middle of cities across the country, where they eat donated food, cause trouble, and try to puzzle out what they do with their own feces. The results of this experiment? Well, 5600 arrests, 400+ incidents, and at least 8 deaths. #Occupyfail
A dishonourable mention, surely—though coming from before 2011 and, sadly, continuing long thereafter—, is the field of “climate science” and the fraudulent conjecture of catastrophic anthropogenic global warming.
The errors of the IPCC and “The Team” keep coming.
I admire your restraint in not naming Obama 10 times.
This is my favorite comment today.
That was funny.
good comment… plan/hope to use it!!
Also, re CHARLIE SHEEN….We believe **”2 1/2 Men” show, suffered more than Charlie…he made out like a bandid..the show is not worth watching anymore…
Ashton is an insipid character that is merely irritating and Jon Cryer, although good, simply cannot carry the show.
So, **we nominate the number one comedy on tv as the loser…not charlie..
Restraint? That would have been too easy!
I would have given the #1 FAIL title to the US federal debt. While GWB was not blameless, there’s a reason we call Obama “Debt Man Walking.”.
Occupy Wall Street is sheer Obama, and both are in the anticapitalist tradition of populism, progressivism, and (statist) Leninism. See http://clarespark.com/2011/10/10/populist-catharsis-on-wall-street/. The author of this article was wise to highlight OWS as a ghastly failure and I predict that it will continue to metastasize in the coming year, gaining adherents in its zeal to disrupt all official events.
Where’s Fast and Furious?
I have to agree with Michael here, where’s Fast and Furious? Or is it too major an ongoing story to be a fail?
Politics, in general, eg..”Fast and Furious”,are so far off the loser scale they have a special “screw the American people, while we laugh at the fools” catagory all their own.
Or how about the Miami heat or philidelpia eagles. “dream teams”.
I’m not a basketball fan so I can’t comment on the Heat, but I totally agree about the absolute and utter FAIL of the Eagles this year. I wonder if Vince Young has ever considered how much he jinxed his team with that little pronouncement of his.
Corrective addition -
…a bunch of dirty, disheveled hippies, anarchists, and homeless people camping out in the middle of cities across the country, where they eat donated food, cause trouble, and try to puzzle out what they do with their own feces…. who have been sanctioned, cheered on, supported, and outright joined at the hip by one of America’s primary political parties…..
There, fixed it for you.
Kim Kardashian’s dad was Robert Kardashian? Who knew? I always assumed it was Fred Gwynne.
Kardashians…are they still alive?
They appear to be nasty rude people
…(and that total WIMP..BRUCE JENNER..OMG, WHAT a total dip!!)
Robert’s brains must have stopped at his penis…it was selective on the gene transfer.. didn’t transfer any brains to those pathetic girls. naaaaasty
If my children ever talked to me the way they do Chris, I would die of heartbreak. WE watched their program a few times and were totally turned off..
Kim might think of looking for a husband like Bruce..she could boss him around, demean him in public..just like Chris does Jenner..
Chris appears to be the power behinds these girls, advertising etc..
The kardashians are the epitome of liberal smut. They are spoiled rotten, raving whores. They turn my stomach inside out. I just wannago back to the good old days when I dream of genie and happy days were on. Now the liberals want force imbelcilic garbage on the masses in the name of diversity and affirmative action. The only reason those girls are on tv is because they have an ethnic background and their father represented that criminal black,O.J. simpson. -Pete-george
Occupy Movement, as in bowels I presume? A natural for our media and the Democrat Party, dirty stupid and ugly, a perfect fit. Obama wasn’t held back by his puppeteers and even tossed this disgraceful mob a few kind words. A true birds of a feather moment
What about Solyndra?
Solyndra
What a crappy year. We couldn’t even score a win from the Iraq war. Thanks for the sad reminders. Now lets put all these skeletons in the closet and leave room for more at the end of 2012.
I live in Pennsylvania, but I find it mind-boggling that people around here still Penn State merchandise and wear it in public. I have never been a Penn State fan, but I find it hard to see their logos and colors without thinking of Sandusky and those slapping noises McCleary heard from the showers. Disgusting. I wouldn’t want anything to do with it, even if I had grown up a life-long fan.
To some people, sports teams are more important, I guess.
“We are Penn State,” indeed. Excuse me while I run to the bathroom to hurl up my breakfast.
I’ve been thinking about making up shirts with “Pedophile State” logos. Probably replace the lion with McCleary.
Or “Penis State”
While I do like most of the list, you dishonor yourself when you put Kardashian crap in from of deadly ‘Fast and Furious’. That seems so out character for any writer since I always thought if it bled, it leads. Not so if it’s government workers getting murdered by government supplied arms? Anyway…
I have to argue with your inclusion of season two of “The Walking Dead” on this list. The storylines certainly dragged, and there weren’t NEARLY enough zombies for my taste, but it absolutely killed in the ratings department, particularly for the season premiere and the mid-season finale. I’d call that a success. And remember, we’ve only seen the first half of S2; the second half debuts in February.
Most shows that I’ve ever watched experience jetlag in their second season. The smart ones figure it out, fix it, and keep going. The dumb ones become “Roswell.”
PS – Also? This season had a helluva lot more Daryl Dixon than S1. I will take five minutes of Norman Reedus strutting around with a crossbow over two hours of just about anything else on TV. “Chupacabra” was the best episode of the season thus far.
Where’s Anthony Weiner?
Solyndra’s half-billion dollar failure didn’t make the list?
How about Jon “I don’t know what happened to the money” Corzine? Latest estimates are at $1.3B.
It’s a culture column, not a political list. The political list, I will probably do for Townhall.
Sorry to be snarky here, but can I nominate “Epic Fail” as the most overused trendy phrase of the year.
That’s so 2010.
PJM’s #10 is Time rag-o-zine’s #1, the idiocy of this Marching Moocher doing a #2 on the very symbol of law & order…
Who said the Liberal Left dominated media has no sense of irony, thinking them so highly?
Kinda says everything one need’s to about the MSM, doesn’t it?
What about Iraq?
Nobody mentioned Herman Cain. Ugh.
Re: Wronghaven
It’s become reflexive, I know, but at this stage of this particular conversation I always feel like there’s a huge hole in the foundation of everyone’s arguments and positions until this particular point is expressed and is sitting out there in plain and uncomfortable sight:
In each and every instance of Righthaven’s filing suit, some newspaper or magazine or blog clearly wrote and published some new creative work, and then someone else who played no part in that creation stole it, and pasted it onto their own work and sent it out to bunches of people under their own name.
That’s all. Meaningless to some, I know. But they’re the same people who believe that if I can invent a master key to cars, then your property interest in your car gives way to this “new reality” they keep talking about – that advances in the tools of theft don’t just make it easier to be a thief – they actually void out existing property rights.
Cannot disagree more about Walking Dead … this season (so far) has delved deeply into the characters and is less about the zombies per se.
Ok, in small doses throughout the year as those stories were fed, i ate them, noting their bitterness in small doses. Now reading them together, I am sickened in the moment and wonder what might be the antidote for the coming year’s dosage of the similar, which will no doubt intensify. Short of the nomination and election of Michelle Bachman, I’d better stock up on alka-seltzer. =(
#1 The GOP Establishment.
Which is unable to get its act together, year, after year, after year.
Take the party nomination process for instance.
Hello?
And, no, you cannot have any of my money. Go away. I’m sorry I ever gave a cent to you in the first place. From now on I ONLY give to candidates I support. The party has no interest in my concerns and I have none in theirs. Go ask the independents.
Uh, the Walking Dead is a television series that will most likely not be renewed next year. I kind of like it, but I have low expectations of zombie shows. Try Homeland. It’s quite good, I think. Or Boardwalk Empire, which is even better. I mean, what CAN you do with zombie infestations, except abhor them? It’s not like it would do any good leaving the safe little farm. Who can begrudge them that?
Frankly, if it were me, after securing a truck load of ammo and liquor, and a couple of ample babes with hide-gnawing talents, I would head to the hills. Like the Grand Tetons. And I would live off fish and elk. And then, after a few years, I would raise an army of hardy folk and retake the countryside.
That is the problem with liberal propagandists. They pander to the lowest common denominator. I can see why crooks, delinquents, and single mothers enjoy their antics. T.V. has gone to the dogs. We are losing the culture war; and subsequently, the battle for our children’s minds. Charlie Sheen is nut. The left loves nuts. They enjoy building these guys up over the years to messianic proportions and when they slip, they feed their carcasses to the tabloid mainstream media wolves. -Pete-george.
I really wonder what brand of crack the NF management is smoking?, they had an absolute lock on the market and kept asking more from subscribers and giving less in return. Yeah, I know Hollyweird was putting the screws to them but that did not justify reaming their base.
The biggest fail of 2011 is, of course, Obama-Banana. Everything this worthless twit touches turns to mud. For number two, I nominate the Republican Party, epitomized by the blockheaded and spineless Boehner and McConnell. Forty-percent of the federal budget is borrowed from Red China, our nation’s deadly enemy, yet there they sit, twidling thumbs. How is it possible for people who call themselves professionals in any field to be so feckless; and that includes the candidates, who wouldn’t know a First Principle, like freedom, if it smacked ‘em in the eye.
Third has got to be Jon Corzine, the lying, stealing face of Liberalism. Fourth is Donald Trump, a fundamentally unserious carnival barker who has made a fool of himself and doesn’t even know it. Fifth — but why go on? Hollywood flutterbys don’t matter; the Occupy idiots are and have always been self-appointed road-kill. Let us look forward and not back!
2011 Sucked, 2012 Could Be Even Worse
On a personal, family level, 2011 was one of the worst years of our lives, but that’s our problem.
On national and world levels, 2011 sucked just as much with the added downer that, unlike us, 2012 holds the prospect of being even worse for the United States and the planet.
Of course, good things happened last year; they always do.
Navy Team 6 dispatching Usama bin laden was the highlight, an economy showing meager signs of improvement was less noteworthy but nevertheless a good thing, GOP candidates having the nerve to debate incessantly and make their opinions known to the electorate was a refreshing novelty, the stock market did fairly well, the Iraq War temporarily ended, and the number of abortions declined.
As is too often the case, the bad outweighed the good both at home and throughout the world in 2011.
Domestically, MSNBC and Bill Maher are still regurgitating, the economy is still wallowing in the doldrums, poverty is increasing as planned by the administration, our borders are farcical, and the nation suffered through a series of unprecedented natural catastrophes as well as social upheaval with 1960′s precedents in the persons of the Occupiers.
However, although Mother Natures’s onslaughts are inevitable and unavoidable, we are free to pull the plug on MSNBC and Maher, the economy will recover, the poor really aren’t really all that bad off, various states are attempting to perform the federal job of stemming illegal immigration, and the Occupiers are more and more recognized for the anarchists they are.
As opposed to those 2011 negatives with silver linings, above all else in the negative category is the fact Barack Hussein Obama still reigns as America’s Chief Executive.
Overseas, cataclysmic natural, economic, and political events were far worse than our own. . . (Read more at http://www.genelalor.com/blog1/?p=11968.)