LIVE: The Early-Bird Special Presidential Debate

Second, I'll let someone else at PJ who is more sober and less exhausted do the full recap.

But...

If I had to do a quick & dirty summary, this would be it.

Trump spent most of the night reminding us that things weren't always this bad, and we had three pretty damn good years on his watch.

Biden?

Biden was "Old man tried to whisper at cloud but mostly failed."

If Team Biden was hoping to lure Trump into a repeat of his lousy 2020 debate performance, it didn't work. If they were hoping to "Let Joe be Joe," it did work. Just not in the way they intended.

I'm out. Thank you so much for joining me.

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It's over.

That's it.

Das Ende. Fini.

Before I go, two quick things...

EASY CALL: Lots of clips tomorrow fact-checking Trump, very few very carefully cherry-picked clips of Biden.

Trump sounds relaxed and on point while keeping his "just winging it" delivery.

It works. I've missed this.

Jeeze, all Biden had to do was give the condensed version of his stump speech and he could barely do that.

Biden blaming Trump for things that happened on HIS watch, however, is a particularly lame and dismissible closing statement.

Spoiler: R or D, Red or Blue, Trump or Biden... nobody cares about the closing statements.

You know why.

— Stephen Green (@VodkaPundit) June 28, 2024

About Biden's "cold."

He didn't seem to have one earlier today when the MSM was running that "hale and hearty, we swear!" video of him arriving in Atlanta for the debate.

And that Old Man Shuffle he did on the way to the lectern can't be explained away as a cold. 

Trump is a little weak at the close, TBH, giving Biden a chance to make the end about Trump instead of about Biden's record.

But that's one small complaint after 90 minutes of solid performance.

* COUGH BULLSH!T COUGH * https://t.co/59oh1FJkZQ

— Liberty Belle (@iLibertyBelle) June 28, 2024

Let the spin begin.

Joe's closing statement starts with a lecture on NATO's article five and... some other stuff. I'm not quite sure. Neither is Joe.

Correction: Not a closing statement, I think.

"I wish he was a great president because I wouldn't be here right now."

Trump, with my favorite line of the night.

Biden had a good slam on Trump's boasts about his height and weight, but then he failed to deliver it. 

This is just sad. 

PUTIN DOESN'T WANT TO SCREW AROUND WITH US.

Joe Biden, explaining the ongoing peace in Ukraine.

Biden wants us to look at his record.

Dude.

Every time I go to the grocery store, fill my gas tank, or try to eat out.

I am SO DONE looking at Biden's record.

MOAR FENTANYL MACHINES WE NEED THOSE MACHINES.

Joe Biden, explaining what happened to the border.

"He gets paid by China, he's a Manchurian candidate."

I don't know if anyone under 50 will get that reference but it was epic. 

I need to take a moment to thank all our PJ VIP members.

I'm an expert at drunkblogging. I invented drunkblogging. And you guys are so awesome that I don't have a chance at even trying to keep up with all the great comments.

Carry on.