Sleep Tight

My least favorite conspiracy theory of right wingers is the one where Hillary Clinton swoops down on the Democratic convention this summer and steals the nomination from [fill in name of “undeserving” Democratic nominee here]. Somehow, there was going to be this brokered convention, see? And then Hillary (who I don’t see as the Antichrist, but who I’m no fan of) would steal the show and, somehow, the election.

My second-to-least favorite right wing conspiracy theory — more of a wet dream, really — is the one where Howard Dean makes a third-party run and ends up destroying the Democratic Party. This NYT op-ed should lay that to rest:

Many Democrats also admire Ralph Nader’s achievements, as I do. But if they truly want George Bush out of the White House, they won’t vote for Ralph Nader in November.

Ralph Nader has built a remarkable legacy as a consumer advocate. Because of his tireless work, we have federal consumer protection laws and a federal department dedicated to the protection of our environment, and millions of defective motor vehicles are off the roads. And I campaigned against the very same corporate special interests that he has been criticizing longer than almost anyone else.

But I don’t believe that the best way to do justice to Ralph Nader’s legacy is to vote for him for president. Re-electing George Bush would undo everything Ralph Nader has worked for through his entire career and, in fact, could lead to the dismantling of many of his accomplishments.

Those words were written by — wait for it! — none other than Howard Dean.