I spent the whole weekend eating lentils and taking the bus like a good little plebe, and yet inflation is still kicking the nation in the crotchola. Maybe it’s time to return $55,000 worth of bottles in Michigan and get a Tesla.
Inflation stings most if you earn less than $300K. Here's how to deal:
➡️ Take the bus
➡️ Don’t buy in bulk
➡️ Try lentils instead of meat
➡️ Nobody said this would be fun https://t.co/HGJEoXL5ZZ— Bloomberg Opinion (@bopinion) March 19, 2022
If you didn’t read the above article I’ll sum it up for you: someone bringing home mad stacks has come up with a list of corndog ways we peons can survive Biden’s brutal inflation. The author suggests you eat beans, sell your car, and let your pet die. I’m not kidding.
I have some suggestions for the author involving her lips and my bus-riding a**. The pure audacity of that article is mind-boggling. Check this out:
Meat prices have increased about 14% from February 2021 and will go up even more. Though your palate may not be used to it, tasty meat substitutes include vegetables (where prices are up a little over 4%, or lentils and beans, which are up about 9%).
She thinks we — the grimey, carnivorous troglodyte masses — don’t consume vegetables?
Nowhere in the article does the fat-cat harpie suggest voting out the slime who have brought this pain upon us.
Who to dares speak to us, the trash of America, this way? This harridan:
Teresa Ghilarducci is the Schwartz Professor of Economics at the New School for Social Research. She’s the co-author of “Rescuing Retirement” and a member of the board of directors of the Economic Policy Institute.
A “professor of economics” has graciously come up with ways for us vegetable-dodging hillbillies to survive. How cute.
In the most garish display of narcissism I’ve seen this side of Dr. “I AM science” Fauci, boob-grabbing serial elder-killer Andrew Cuomo is teasing/threatening a return run for New York’s governor’s mansion.
What will his campaign slogan be? “I grabbed your a** and I killed you meemaw, but I am back to defecate on you some more. I want you idiots to vote for me again”?
What kind of absent-minded, drooling goobers does this arrogant puddle of inadequacy think we are? He essentially slaughtered a yet-unknown number of elderly people, pretended it wasn’t his idea, then lied about how many he massacred. Then there are the dozen or so women who claimed he touched them inappropriately. Not to mention his tasteless “eat the whole sausage” bit, filmed as his daughter sat next to him, watching.
Cuomo is campaigning on “Un-do the bail laws” that have turned the human-turd-filled streets of New York into the ghetto it is. That law was his idea.
Should we even be shocked by lefty audacity? As angry as all of this makes me, we have to realize that Democrats are accustomed to failing up. Joe Biden is a career joke of a politician yet he is in the White House, even though we now know he, his brother, and his gutter-punk son, Hunter, are earlobe-deep in corruption.
Related: The Nation Isn’t Divided, the Left Is Just Too Sick to Deal With
Also, Democrat voters never learn. I know libs who can’t wait to vote for Cuomo, even though they are selling bodily fluids just to feed their kids crappy, off-brand foods. Fruit Loops are expensive, so they’re buying “Fruity Rings.” Can’t afford Nutella? Get yourself a jar of Nut Master. Next week at this time, those kids will be fighting their cat for its plate of Honduran-made Fancy Fiesta. But hey, we are all in this together, right? No, were are not. I didn’t vote for any of this. I’m going to sit down next to Cuomo and tell him to “Eat all my Nut Master.”
Rant over. Carry on, patriots. We can and will beat these arrogant toads in November. If things get REALLY bad, we can always steal our lefty neighbors’ housepets for food. Don’t knock Yorkie-burgers until you try them.
