KRUISER’S MORNING BRIEF: Idiots at USA Today Apparently Ignorant of the American Eagle. “Before we delve into this lunacy about the eagle in question, it should be noted that USA Today is the CNN of newspapers. Just as CNN would have no audience whatsoever if it weren’t being broadcast to people stuck in airport terminals, USA Today wouldn’t have any readership if it weren’t being given away for free in hotels all over the country. Honestly, I rarely read it when I’m on the road and it’s delivered to my hotel room door every weekday.”