Caution: This Could Kill YouThis just makes me mad:

A patron called Lewisville police after what they claim happened during a stop at the restaurant and bar called Redneck Heaven. When officers went to the establishment to investigate they found female waitresses serving customers with only body paint and pasties covering their breasts.

There were no charges filed or arrests made, because the wait staff had broken no law.

“If any business were to decide to become a licensed Sexually Oriented Business then none of this matters for that particular establishment, but it applies here because the complaints were about a business that is licensed as a regular restaurant,” Lewisville Community Relations Manager James Kunke explained.

Lewisville Police Chief Russell Kerbow subsequently sent a memo to the City Manager saying that while the restaurant was not in violation of the current ordinance, members of the department feel the definition of nudity or state of nudity needs to be changed.

Somebody went to a place called Redneck Heaven, saw some body paint, and went to the cops about it. Now the city council needs to get involved, because… well, I guess because of pretty 23-year-old waitresses who aren’t wearing very much.

If you don’t like what the servers are (or aren’t) wearing, then just leave the damn restaurant. This business of people thinking their personal preferences need to be given the weight of law accounts for every major problem facing this country today. Every single one.

So now we’ll have a bunch of ignorant politicians debating the weighty matter of exactly what geometry of the female breast away from the nipple is allowed to be exposed and what constitutes proper coverage of said side- and/or under-boob.

I’ll tell you who the boobs are: the people who went to the cops instead of walking back to their car.