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Lewisville Is for Boobs

July 17th, 2013 - 6:23 am

Caution: This Could Kill YouThis just makes me mad:

A patron called Lewisville police after what they claim happened during a stop at the restaurant and bar called Redneck Heaven. When officers went to the establishment to investigate they found female waitresses serving customers with only body paint and pasties covering their breasts.

There were no charges filed or arrests made, because the wait staff had broken no law.

“If any business were to decide to become a licensed Sexually Oriented Business then none of this matters for that particular establishment, but it applies here because the complaints were about a business that is licensed as a regular restaurant,” Lewisville Community Relations Manager James Kunke explained.

Lewisville Police Chief Russell Kerbow subsequently sent a memo to the City Manager saying that while the restaurant was not in violation of the current ordinance, members of the department feel the definition of nudity or state of nudity needs to be changed.

Somebody went to a place called Redneck Heaven, saw some body paint, and went to the cops about it. Now the city council needs to get involved, because… well, I guess because of pretty 23-year-old waitresses who aren’t wearing very much.

If you don’t like what the servers are (or aren’t) wearing, then just leave the damn restaurant. This business of people thinking their personal preferences need to be given the weight of law accounts for every major problem facing this country today. Every single one.

So now we’ll have a bunch of ignorant politicians debating the weighty matter of exactly what geometry of the female breast away from the nipple is allowed to be exposed and what constitutes proper coverage of said side- and/or under-boob.

I’ll tell you who the boobs are: the people who went to the cops instead of walking back to their car.

Comments are closed.

Top Rated Comments   
Field trip!! Field trip!!!
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
Average beer? Now that is unforgivable.
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
I find this quote from C.S. Lewis to be quite fitting:

“Of all tyrannies, a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It would be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron's cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end for they do so with the approval of their own conscience.”
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
All Comments   (64)
All Comments   (64)
Sort: Newest Oldest Top Rated
Well, we've learned what gets comments ... haven't we.
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
People drag their living rooms with them everywhere they go.
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
Having drunkenly wandered into a gay bar or two in my adventurous days, I learned quickly that you could quickly go out the in door.
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
Stephen, I live less than a half hour away and would be happy to investigate :-) Breasterants like Twin Peaks and the Tilted Kilt are fairly common in North Texas and most normal bars hire attractive young waitresses who wear revealing or at least flattering uniforms. If I remember correctly, the issue was that the Redneck Heaven girls in body paint were visible to people outside the restaurant.
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
Isn't some Christian SoCon going to tell us that what these women are doing is sinful?
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
What these women are doing is sinful (because they're not doing it in my town).
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
Why? You wanna be told? Glad to oblige if you really want; but I think the group you want is actually Muslim. Try to find a local mosque, and I'm sure they'll give you all the lecturin' you want on the evils of wimminfolk. Just sayin'.
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
Hey! I mentioned that a rock group (sort of) did a song on the topic, and it got reported. Kinda makes you want to go watch some MSNBC.
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
Nothing, even an in-depth story in HD and 3-D, would make me want to watch MSNBC.
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
I disagree. I think adult establishments should be identified as such.
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
I pity you. You are so up tight that apparently a little flesh sends you and the complaining party off the deep end. What the Hell ever happened to personal responsibility? Like the article states...If you don't like what is (or isn't) covered, leave the damn restaurant. And leave the rest of u alone. I am plenty old enough to make my own decisions about what is acceptable to me and I don't need some tight-ass to "educate" me.
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment

Consider the possibility that you have taken your mother, up in years, out for dinner, to a new place you've never patronized before... .

Now, doesn't some discreet signage seem to make sense?
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
Unless there's a horrible secret in your family I guarantee that there's nothing on display in that restaurant your mother hasn't seen before.

And what kind of terrible parent takes their kid to someplace they haven't scoped out first?
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
You would take your elderly ma to a place called "Red Neck Heaven" without calling or Yelping to inquire about the character of the place?

AlanaD, or your kids?
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
I didn't realize it said all that on the sign.
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
No, I wouldn't take a place named "Redneck Heaven" to be a place like that.
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
You expect someone going to a place called "redneck heaven" to know what a Yelp is? The onus is not on the patron to guess or have to suss out what's going on inside other than FOOD. It needs to be mentioned in some form. No one ever thought Hooters served owls. ;)
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
My first impression was that it was all Star Warsy with Wookies and games for kids and the Cartoon Channel on every screen.
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
I expect grownups to leave grownups alone. But apparently that's a dated concept.
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
Or children.

And no, Faceless, it's name doesn't indicate that.

40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
It was identified as such. By its name.
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
No, it isn't. Many people associate a "redneck heaven" with beer and sawdust, not body-paint and pasties. A lot of self-described "rednecks" (the real ones, not yankee wannabe's) don't go in for this kind of stuff; and would be embarrassed and offended by it if they took the family expecting a mechanical-bull-ridin' Gillie's experience and got this Hooters knockoff instead.
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
Sawdust. Sawdust? How do you think rednecks reproduce? It's not like they sit on walls and smoke corn silk. Did you think "Hee Haw" was about donkeys?
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
But that's how my parents reproduced ... lots of corn silk.
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
One last thing. The sign outside reads "Restaurant. Bar. Sports. Mischief." If that doesn't tell you what's inside, you deserve to be offended.

What you don't deserve is to call the cops to whine at the city council to pass an ordnance to ruin everybody else's fun.
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
You are absolutely right. I still remember when a single woman in my university town of around 100,000 people managed to ban cats walking around freely. A neighbor's cat had peed on her yard, she raised a ruckus with the city council, and they immediately passed a bylaw banning cats from walking around freely. Suddenly anyone who had a cat needed to put it on a leash (with them holding on to the other end) so that Fluffy could step outside without being rounded up by the Pet Police. If you've ever tried to walk a cat on a leash, I think you'll know how well that would go over with the cat....

There's something grievously wrong about a single person with a complaint being able to change life for an entire city singlehandedly. There should have been some kind of referendum on whether that law was necessary or even wanted by many residents. Instead, one loudmouth changed things for everybody on a whim.
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
Agreed. "Mischief" sums it up more that adequately, and IS fair warning. No ordinance needed, or large neon warning signs announcing the dangers of Bare Nekkid Wimmin With Pasty Nipples Inside. I had assumed that the opportunity for ogling was a surprise upon entering...but if you're lookin' for mischief, well, there's only a few ways to take that.
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
Caveat emptor. And the entrance door works just as well as an exit door.
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
That is sure to augment their business.
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
"If any business were to decide to become a licensed Sexually Oriented Business then none of this matters for that particular establishment..."

Leaving aside the weightiness and pointedness of the situation, does anyone else find it interesting that the Community Relations Manager is suggesting this establishment needs to register as an SOB?
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
I know that in my town any time you read that some massage parlor or "after hours" spot got raided and closed down or some strip joint got charged over lewd and licentious behavior by the strippers you can be assured that somebody didn't keep up with their payments.
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
I am shocked! :o)
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
Bumpy womans! Me like!
40 weeks ago
40 weeks ago Link To Comment
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