“Hello, Starbucks? Do You Deliver?”
July 25th, 2009 - 9:31 am
It’s a simple series of steps to perform:
1. Listen for the gurgle of the coffee maker finishing up.
2. Get off of sofa and walk to kitchen.
3. Get clean coffee mug from cabinet, set down on counter next to fridge.
4. Remove half & half from fridge, pour tiny amount in mug, put back in fridge.
5. Bring mug to coffee maker.
6. Remove thermal carafe from coffee maker and twist open the top.
7. Pour… hot water?… into mug. What the hell?
8. Notice coffee grinder is still full of freshly-ground beans.
The problem with making coffee is, you have to do it before you’ve had any coffee.
This is exactly why I have a grind & brew coffee maker.
Thanks Steve. Laugh and laugh some more.
And I’m with Doug. Grind and brew ftw. Mine just finished the grindy part and has moved on the gurgle phase.
Glad to hear I’m not the only one to do that….
Amen to the grind and brew solution. By shifting the human interaction portion of the process to the night before, it cuts epic coffee failures drastically.
I’ve had one for a couple years now, and I’m down to about one coffeeless morning per month now, which is a major improvement. I either forget to check the bean hopper, or fill the water tank, or flip the little drip bucket over to the left. But any of those are easily remedied in the AM.
Probably not coincidentally, the fail mornings often follow nights of excessive alcohol consumption, which is unfortunately the time I need the coffee the most…
There’s another permutation to this.
Enjoy enticing, if unusually strong, aroma of roasting coffee.
Pour lukewarm water into cup.
Notice that filter is full of hot, dry ground beans, since pot of water was set onto heater-thingy and never poured into coffeemaker.
Reflect on catch-22 as stated above.
At least you can have caffeinated coffee in the morning. My stomach doesn’t allow such pleasures (been to the emergency room twice after vomiting blood; my tummy’s a wee-bit sensitive), so I have to suffer my way through morning without that jolt awake.
Yeah, yeah. Sucks to be me!
I do miss real coffee, though. Lived on it in college and in my 20s. Nothing quite like it.
The problem with making coffee is, you have to do it before you’ve had any coffee.
Words to live by.
(Sit waiting numbly for coffee. After 10 minutes or so, wonder idly why nothing is happening. Return to kitchen, press ON button.)
Yeah, Charlie, I’ve done that one, too.
My trick to to make it and sit around waiting until I realize I haven’t turned it on.
Thank you sir; I shall quote you, and credit you. Allow me to do you a favor?
Problem:
having to make coffee before drinking coffee.
Solution:
caffeinated chocolates on my bedstand.
Distinction:
serious chocolate, 60% cacoa minimum, preferably 70+, and leave the rest to the fragrant ground roasted sacred bean.
My personally most frequent version: start grinder, wonder at distinct lack of grinding noise, notice that whole beans have been scooped into the filter basket.
I see your “forgetting to add coffee” and raise you a “absentmindedly dumping ground coffee into coffee maker reservoir.” (At least the former scenario might clean the coffee maker.)
I cannot recommend this device highly enough:
http://www.amazon.com/Cuisinart-DGB-600BC-Grind-Brushed-Chrome/dp/B00006F2MI/ref=sr_1_15?ie=UTF8&s=home-garden&qid=1248729374&sr=1-15
Not only do you have the luxury of 10 minutes of extra sleep in the morning, but you also get to wake up to that fresh coffee smell.