Debate Drunkblogging — LIVE!
7:01pm (Mountain) I’m full of steak and fries and red wine and have the TV tuned into MSNBC. Lord, that last part must mean I’m already drunk.
7:03pm Brian Williams is the moderator, plus Tim Russert for weight. Perhaps literally. In a welcome break from CNN’s format, Williams is skipping the photo ops and other BS and getting straight to the debate.
7:05pm “What’s wrong or right with Bush’s stimulus package?” Romney has this question, and he’s answering in quite some detail. And by that I mean, I’m concentrating a lot more on the Cabernet than the candidate.
7:07pm To McCain: “Will you vote to make the Bush tax cuts permanent?” McCain comes right out and says he’s done that twice already, and that he’ll cut corporate taxes, too. He’s done well in debates before, but even so I’ve always thought he started off weak and tired. That doesn’t seem true tonight. Of course, I still don’t want to vote for the First Amendment-busting MF.
7:09pm to Giuliani: “What do you think of cutting taxes?” “Oh, nasty taxes!” Well, close enough. Rudy is tying together tax cuts with economic growth, and he sounds OK, I suppose. But now that he’s talking about reducing regulations, I’m really getting genuinely excited.
7:11pm Russert: It used to be Iraq, but now the issue is the economy. And he’s asking McCain. Ron Paul and the other guy just got totally stiffed. Speaking of stiffed, it’s damn near martini time. Bring on a commercial break, please.
7:11.5pm Also, McCain is answering. His answer pretty much boils down to “Experience.”
7:12pm Huckabee claims he has the voters’ trust. Not this voter, brother.
7:13pm Huckabee wants to build a great big highway. Ron Paul is seething, because he just know it’s the fifth sign of the coming of the North American Union.
7:14pm To Romney: “Are these other jokers really tax cutters?” Again, Paul got stiffed. Again, Romney appears stiff. You know what bugs me about Romney? If his hair were even only slightly curly, you’d swear he was a Viagra-laced penis. The man is erect.
7:14.5pm Mormon Erectus.
7:16pm I take it back — McCain now looks lost and is stumbling over a softball question.
7:18pm Woo-hoo! A question for Paul. “Should the government have any role in stimulating the economy?” A GREAT question for a libertarian candidate. And how does Paul respond? With a quickfire, rambling answer covering everything from the Fed to the weak dollar to a “trillion dollar a year foreign policy.” Folks, we have a two trillion dollar Federal budget, most of which is transfer payment. Paul is, in short, a big fat, high-pitched liar.
7:20pm To Giuliani: Honestly, I didn’t hear the question, because I was busy calling Paul names and sipping wine. But whatever it was, it gave Rudy yet another chance to tell the story about the time he told the Saudis to take their check and shove it. I like Rudy a little less every day — but I love that story. Also, he sounds like he knows he’s about to lose in Florida. And thus endeth his candidacy.
7:22pm I wonder when McCain is going to give us some “straight talk” about how he and Russ Feingold raped the First Amendment.
7:23pm Dude needs a cocktail if he’s going to make it through another one of these.
7:25pm Mike Huckabee just backhandedly denounced Reaganomics. Forget if he’s right or wrong — how’s that going to play in the Sunbelt?
7:27pm Once you start to think of Romney as a six-foot-tall erect penis, you just can’t see him any other way. I mean, watch the guy with that in mind and tell me I’m wrong. “We’re the party of fiscal responsibility. Bulging, thrusting fiscal responsibility.”
7:28pm Rudy is running on experience. So is Hillary. It might work for her, but it’s looking less and less like it will work for Giuliani.
7:29pm What’s going on with the left side of Paul’s hair?
7:30pm Oh, great — a local reporter is asking questions submitted by local people. Neither seems ready for prime time, not even on MSNBC. And that’s saying something, kids.
7:33pm Gen Barry Mccaffrey (ret) says the US needs an Army of about 800,000. The question is, how do we get there without a draft? What a stupid question. Remember the Army that won the first Gulf War in 100 hours? If we reduce recruiting standards to the levels we had in 1991, we’d have an Army larger than the 1.1 million men we had wearing green back then. Good thing Brian Williams has an editor to catch these things, yes?
7:35pm Russert is willing to give each candidate 30 seconds to explain why Iraq was a good idea. 30 whole seconds!
7:36pm Giuliani turned his answer into an anti-Hillary crusade. Dude, that worked for you last fall, but right now you’ve got to focus on McCain and Romney.
7:37pm Paul is against war and other bad things.
7:37.5pm Huckabee is thankful for George Bush, Jesus, and puppies. Or something. Man, I hate this guy, even when I kind of agree with him.
7:39pm Blessed be — a commercial break! And that means I get to finish my wine in one big sip and go mix my first martini. Back in a flash.
7:43pm Williams just used the word “exigency.” Does he think he’s working for PBS or something?
7:44pm The Giant Man Penis has some penetrating insights on China and the economy.
7:46pm Giuliani is also talking about China, and asking “What can we sell to China?” I dunno, maybe some Indian prescription drugs?
7:47pm Williams reminds the candidates to “mind the blinking lights.” He doesn’t have to tell Ron Paul twice. They’ve been advising him since the ’80s.
7:48pm Huckabee says “we’re peeeeenalized” and all I could think of was Romney’s bobbing head. This is going to be a long, long debate, folks.
7:49pm Huckabee: “Drugs, pimps, gamblers… non-Republicans.” Tell that to Bill Bennett, bub.
7:50pm Huckabee says under the Fair Tax, we get to “choose the taxes.” My choice, as usual, is “none of the above.” My second choice is “tax this!”
7:52pm Credit where it’s due. Paul got to ask a question of McCain, and he took less than ten seconds and never once mentioned the Federal Reserve.
7:54pm Romney just claimed credit for getting pro and anti-gun control people together. The sound you just heard was millions of his votes getting sucked out of the South. It’s hard to see how McCain doesn’t become the nominee. It’s even harder to see me voting Republican next November.
7:56pm Giuliani just accused Romney of being too lawyerly. Which is probably true, especially if the lawyer in question is a six-foot man penis.
7:58pm When you talk about the weather, I tune you out. When presidential candidates are forced to talk about the weather, I worry about the fate of the American commonweal. And then I go pour myself a drink. Excuse me while I miss the next question or two.
8:01pm So I come back from refilling my martini glass, and Rudy is talking about nuclear energy, and McCain counters that he likes cap’n'trade and Joe Lieberman. Well, I like a big strong cocktail and just one candidate I can get behind. One out of two ain’t bad…
8:06pm Oh, crap. They came back.
8:07pm To Rudy: “Your polls suck. What happened?” You know what? The only thing worse than polls is talking about them, and the only thing worse than talking about polls is using them for fodder in a “debate” which is presumably about ideas.
8:09pm The question to McCain comes from his mom, who says that Republicans will have to “hold their nose” and vote for him. Cute. Useless, but cute.
8:11pm To Romney: “How do you run against BOTH Clintons?” Mitt says he can’t wait to see Bill Clinton in the White House with nothing to do. Oh, he’ll find someone to do in the White House. Er, something. Sorry.
8:13pm Also to Mitt: “How much of your own money are you spending on this campaign?” Romney dodged it, and looked weak doing so. Man, what a dick.
8:14pm Big giant throbbing penis.
8:15pm Romney is — again — answering the religious test question. I’ll call the man a giant man penis, but give him a break here. Being a Mormon does not automatically disqualify him from holding office.
8:17pm “Are you still in favor of abolishing social security?” Asked, of course, of Ron Paul. “Yes, but…” He wants to keep paying the elderly (ie, Florida voters) and do something something blank left unsaid for young people using the money we’re now spending on useless stuff like foreign policy.
8:19pm Huckabee has been talking for at least half an hour now. And people ask me how and why I invented drunkblogging.
8:22pm See my last comment, but replace the word “Huckabee” with “Romney.”
8:24pm Rudy says he wants to stop “illegal immigration at the border.” How many Miami residents got there via boat from Cuba? Smart play?
8:26pm Chuck Norris says McCain is too old to be President. Chuck Norris once said my baby was too old for diapers, and the next day the kid was potty trained.
8:28pm McCain is going to sic Rambo on Norris. In next week’s debate: Who wins a fight between Superman and Batman?
8:29pm Duh. Superman.
8:29.5pm Giuliani is saying something about being “off-agenda.” I have no idea what he’s talking about, but I do know that a yellow utility belt can’t beat flying and super-strength.
8:31pm The six-foot man-penis is running on his record, and his record is stiffly pro-life and anti-gay. Very stiffly anti-gay. Suspiciously stiffly and handsomely anti-gay.
8:33pm The question to McCain is: Aren’t you too angry to be President? Answer: “I’ll nuke the mother who suggested that.”
8:34pm To Huckabee: Aren’t you too close to Jesus? Answer: We’re not that close, although He’s always welcome to borrow our spare futon, any time He needs a place to crash.
8:35pm To Paul: Will you run as a third-party candidate? “I have no intention… no plan… no intention to do that… it might keep them on their toes.” I want so much to like Paul, but he just makes it impossible.
8:36pm It’s over! If I have any conclusive thoughts, I’ll write a post-debate conclusive-thoughts post in just a few minutes.
“we have a two trillion dollar Federal budget,”
2.7.
500 billion for defense. Supplementals for Iraq/Afghanistan, not included in that 500, which run 50-150 a pop depending on how long they’re for.
He’s exaggerating, but not by much.
No soy Paultard.
Sorry — that was supposed to read “three.” I blame the wine. Later, I’ll blame the great big martini I’m about to pour.
This is the best! I’m a Luddite without cable, so I watch the debate via liveblogging. Stephen, your writing and wit are beyond reproach, especially viewed through the clearing haze of quality alcohol. How do you mix your martinis?
(And just so you know, I’m not being sarcastic. In this day and age, it’s sometimes difficult to tell.)
Well, thanks. Now all I can do is stare at the left side of Ron Paul’s hair and think of Mitt Romney as a penis. Did he was his eyebrows?
Wax his eyebrows that is!
Yes they are battling among themselves but I love it when they point out the insanity that is the Dems/Hillary…I think Romney scored points with his “audacity” comment
Ok. McCain wants Huck for his Veep. He’s got a little crush on Huck!
VP, the gummint is going to give me some of your money for “stimulus.” How would you like me to spen that, sir?
Romney was so flaccid there.
McCain’s favorite Democrat!!! That’s his problem in one comment…sheeesh
I think you all are nuts. How can you not be outraged at the exclusion of dr. ron paul. he was not asked any questions for like the first 20-25 minutes! He would have won louisiana, (of course the msm has not reported this), had not all candidates gone together and formed a false party/platform, because they knew he was the only one going there and talking to the louisianans. I am so sick of candidates picking and choosing their states, when rp has consistently (just like his voting) gone there to campaign. I guess most candidates don’t care about the whole u.s., they just care about winning the big states. Be taken in, sheep.
awesome, the buying the presidency question!
It is Louisianian.
sry, boudreaux, i am minnesotan, i know no better
Dear God, Julie ~ have some more KoolAid. It’s obvious the gentle influence of vodka will have no effect on you.
I love vodka, tree, I think you need to drink less!
Well, Mitt’s shirt look’s freshly pressed. Can’t say that about Paul’s shirt. Rudy’s – did he even iron it?
baaaaa
Somehow I thought that was apropos.
I’m in ‘who do I dislike the least” mode. It’s between Mitt Lingam and Giuliani right now. Although quite honestly I’m not sure that America doesn’t deserve four years of Obama.
Do you really care about wrinkles when it comes to a leader of our country? Yay, finally RP gets to speak again. Finally! and he is speaking truth
RP makes sense…Romney’s crazy…uhhhh ok
Now that Kucinich is out, does Ronpaul get 100% of the UFO vote?
Thank god, you have finally came around Ned! (i get your misguided sarcasm)
Sheesh, can’t some of these guy’s run a frickin’ iron over their shirt before a debate? Come on guy’s, this is the big leagues now.
Huckabee wants to pay for Social Security from the general fund after going to the “Fair Tax”. Uh… really?
Dave and Ned, obviously you have read only smear on Dr. Ron Paul. Google him, read up, and open up your minds. Do not let the media and politicians choose your leaders for you.
…useless stuff like foreign policy.
lol
It’s only Spring Training when the party’s nut still gets to be on the stage.
Yeah, KG, that was stupid, Social Security is funding the general fund.
Dave, which one’s the nut?
The bald authoritarian? The populist preacher? Or the guy that actually wants to cut government?
Yeah, I know…
In the last debate, Ronpaul said he wanted to take the money that we were spending on war and use it for health care. I think someone slipped him some of Hillary’s notes.
THS – you anywhere near Val? Because I think his head is going to explode with the wet foot/dry foot question…
Is it right for a Paulista to call other people “sheep”?
Go back to Moon Base Alpha, julie, you will find Paul AND Kucinich waiting for you.
So, Huckabee is running to be McCain’s Veep?
Dave, they want to make him appear to be a nut. Because all politicians, except for RP, want to keep the status quo, they want to keep all the money they can get from us, they do not trust us to spend our own money wisely, to donate to charities, to our churches, to our coworkers in need. In fact, they denounce that, they want us to give them total power (we are sheep, and stupid). The more power they get , the better. RP is the first to challenge that, and they feel very threatened that he will succeed, at least in his message, and people will be less likely to blindly follow if they thwart him. You want to believe all the talking heads onstage, go ahead, I will vote for the govt official who has a consistent, conservative voting record, one who does not just tell people what they want to hear.
Lieberman is Juan McCain’s veep.
…by letting him speak once in a while.
Are McCain and Huck going to french now?
You go ahead and trust in nice conservative Ron Paul, just try not to trip on the racist occupying his office.
Dave, you are a total idiot (and i mean that in a very respectful way)
I will vote for the non-Donk nominee whose initials are not RP, if by some insane twist of fate RP is the nominee, I’ll write in Fred.
Do we really want a president that begins an answer with, “Gosh…”?
I would pay to see a debate between Paul and Kucinich. Hell, make it a PPV and you could erase the national debt.
Good luck with that
When told by a Ronpaulian that you’re an idiot, that’s high praise. Thanks
Your welcome, I just wanted to show you that all ronpaulites are not crazy. I am sorry if you disagree with what i have said, but there is no way you can call me crazy. (or maybe you can, you seem to be very small minded)
Paul could shave his head and carve a nice ‘AB’ tattoo in his arm after gaining the WH. America’s first skinhead POTUS.
I know one Ron Paul supporter who is crazy. His name is Ron Paul.
I find it hilarious that anti Ron Paul people talk about the fans of Ron Paul about them being idiots. And yet, you go into a chat room or a blog and make comments, in a intelligent manner, and get attacked. I think the 70% against the good doctor are imbalanced themselves, lol
I keep drifting off. Who is that one guy? Which one’s “Huck”?
I’m going to stick with Mitt Lingam if it’s all the same to you all.
Geez, what am I SAYING!?!?
Kraken, that was a whole smear tactic, have you not heard all the skuttlebutt on all the other candidates?
Is Williams unaware of Ronpaul’s past?
Jim:
Was that an obscure Pink Floyd “The Wall” reference?
Which one’s “Pink?”
I’m leaning towards Paul, mainly because he gives answers like this. It’s a shame the GOP doesn’t believe in limited government any more.
RP just got major cheers! go RP!
I find it hilarious that indignant Ron Paul supporters showcase their tolerance by claiming that the majority of people who don’t support him are “imbalanced”.
I wish I could remember that word…starts with hypoc…I can’t remember the rest.
The Ronpaulians are just itching to start yelling.
Mitt Lingam
Lol.
No Pink Floyd ref. I’m just a rank-n-file Zep guy.
Kraken, that was a whole smear tactic, have you not heard all the skuttlebutt on all the other candidates?
Scuttlebutt? RP hangs with guys from Stormfront, hell, he gets his photo taken with them.
Smear my ass, the guy is a flat-out racist.
That was his best Julie…but his message needs to be repackaged
Kraken, you started it, we never said you were crazy, until you started attacking our candidate, the only candidate who has voted consistently, for like 20 years, get over yourself
The Ronulans have decloaked and are moving in at warp 100.
Ron Paul: the Whig candidate for our time.
No I didn’t start it, I just joined the already initiated conversation. You called those who don’t believe in RP’s message “sheep”.
Well this is one sheep who doesn’t plan on voting for a guy who hangs with the likes of ‘The White Citizens Council’ no matter who conservative he claims to be.
Go to youtube, NAACP, and you will see it is just smear. Go to RP’s websites, and you will see the diversity of his supporters.
Kraken, i think you have an agenda.
The only agenda is not electing a racist in the mold of every democrat running in this race.
Paul has his pic taken with Stormfront leaders. He chimes in on White Citizens Council radio shows. He goes to John Birch Society dinners. He gives speeches to secessionist groups and talks about the “once and future republic of Texas”. The guy is endorsed by David Duke who regularly hosts his speeches and writings.
Ron Paul is supremacist hack and the LAST thing republicans need is to have that loadstone hanging from our necks.
And the only smear I see is what the guy actually writes and says.
If you don’t believe the libs wouldn’t LOVE to have this guy as our nominee, then you are cracked; it would make their nominee a shoe-in. But even those idiots can’t stomach Paul.
The dems are torn between “hope” and “the first false “black president”, who is alienating all the voters by his heavy handed tactics in trying to get his wife elected.
I daresay that Republicans would have more problems if the front runner was Edwards, at least that is what my Democrat friends think.
I believe RP would take some of the Dem votes, he wants out of the war, he believes in personal freedom, and states rights. If more people were exposed to RP’s message, maybe they would jump on board. It is hard , though, when MSM will not report on him, when he wins 2nd in primaries or caucuses and it is not reported, and when his supporters, who are generally younger, want to change the world and will eventually be in RP’s position, are shunned , called paulites, or crazy. Good luck, gop, you are alienating your own brethen.
8:24pm Rudy says he wants to stop “illegal immigration at the border.” How many Miami residents got there via boat from Cuba? Smart play?
1. Who cares how it plays? Is it in the best interests of the U.S.?
2. Rudy’s been saying this for months. Why didn’t they ask a followup question instead of just letting him give a speech?
3. He can’t “stop” it, the most anyone can do is greatly reduce it. Why didn’t they call him on such an outrageous lie?
I realize I spent time typing that out, but I don’t think SG would have come up with that or more even given several minutes.
I have no idea what he’s talking about, but I do know that a yellow utility belt can’t beat flying and super-strength.
This is Batman we’re talking about. Do you really think he doesn’t have a set of kryptonite knuckles in there? The Batman is the ultimate embodiment of the boy scout motto- Be Prepared. For anything. Including some badguy mind-controlling Supes (it’s not like it hasn’t happened before…).
Kraken is an asshole.
Just wanted to throw that out .
Thank goodness rosignol finally addresses the truly critical issue at hand; of course Batman would win! He already kicked Super-butt in Miller’s Batman: The Dark Knight Returns.
I might add (for the Bat-fans out there) that Hot Wheels has finally released their 1/63 (standard HW scale)1966 Batmobile, with a 1/48 and 1/18 scale coming out the next couple of months.
On a less serious note, while I was hoping for Fred, I have been expecting Rudy to win. I would have found a Rudy/Fred ticket acceptable, but apparently Fred has ruled any VP considerations out.
If the nominee turns out to be McCain or Romney, I’ll look seriously the Dems. Heck, at least they’re honest about their desire to nanny-state you, unlike the two jokers above.
An Ossified Viagara Penis?
I will not be able to look at Mitt Romney without thinking of your description of him. You got off a number of very funny observations. I hope you are wrong about Rudy.
This is just about the _funniest_ thing I’ve read this year:
7:47pm Williams reminds the candidates to “mind the blinking lights.” He doesn’t have to tell Ron Paul twice. They’ve been advising him since the ’80s.
Oh my gosh. You’ve nailed the Dr.
HIGH QUALITY blog! LOVED THIS!!
Thanks!
Always,
Crusty~