After Action Report
Actually, still in the middle of the action. Here’s what I’ve done since Saturday:
Drove up to Denver.
Drove out to Brush, CO.
Jumped out an airplane.
Drove back to Denver.
Helped throw a bachelor party.
Witnessed many fake breasts.
Was somehow allowed to consume four vodka martinis in 2.5 hours.
Continued partying with the bachelorettes.
Drove back to the Springs, hungover.
Cleaned a garage.
Cleaned an entire basement.
Moved 30+ cubic feet of dirt.
Removed tile.
Helped replace tile.
Carted tile somewhere out of the way, waiting for trash day.
Hoarded Independence Day party supplies.
Cleaned the damn basement again.
And the garage.
Disassembled the over-built bathroom vanity which used to be our wet bar.
Hauled several cubic hectares or something worth of construction garbage out to the curb.
Made four trips to Home Depot.
Fought with the electrician.
Endured a muscle-relaxant hangover.
Twice.
Fought with the general contractor.
Three times.
Fought with the landscapers.
Seeded the lawn.
Fertilized the lawn.
Cursed at the never-ending rain for washing away all the grass seed and fertilizer.
Thanked Whomever that Will Collier has somehow found some time to post some fine items to this website.
And too many other small chores to list.
Regular blogging will resume Tuesday, July 6 — assuming I get some sleep on the 5th. Smart readers, however, will have already placed their bets on my being too hungover.
You know, I’m tired after just reading that. I think I’ll take the rest of the week off.
God save the Republic!
Happy 4th everyone! Enjoy your freedom and thank a soldier.
Slacker.
Hold it; was was that about breasts, again?
One must assume you mean 30 cu yd of dirt; 30 cu ft could be shifted with a trowel.
Even so: knock it off, man! If my wife reads this, I’ll be on my feet all weekend!
Cursed at the never-ending rain for washing away all the grass seed and fertilizer.
Know the feeling. Just had $3200 worth of grass seed (Hydroseed) wash off. We went 10 days without rain after the application, giving it plenty of time to get dried out. First rain washed it all away.
Garr!
That’s a lot of dirt.
You’re still a leg, Stephen
- D
TO: Stephen Green
RE: Okay….
“Jumped out an airplane.” — Stephen Green
How far above the ground was it at the time you exited?
Regards,
Chuck(le)
[God is alive....and airborne-ranger qualified.]
30 cubic feet is a cubic yard (plus some), which is a nontrivial amount. Call it more than a ton of dirt.
Stephen, you Coloradans are never happy. First, it’s the drought, next it’s too much rain. Well, you could try sodding your lawn next time. No double-meaning intended.