From my friend Ron Radosh, who got an early start on his 2012 tax return:

I just received my tax return for 2012 back from the IRS. It puzzles me!! They are questioning how many dependents I claimed. I guess it was because of my response to the question: “List all dependents?”

I replied: 12 million illegal immigrants; 3 million crack heads; 42 million unemployed people on food stamps, 2 million people in over 243 prisons half of Mexico; and 535 persons in the U.S. House and Senate.”

Evidently, this was NOT an acceptable answer.

I KEEP ASKING MYSELF, WHO THE HELL DID I MISS?