Dating Along Party-lines
When opposites no longer attract.
September 27, 2012 - 12:11 pm
It seems that even dating is becoming more polarized with this election (via Newsalert):
Political affiliation has become a bigger deal now than it was during the last election,” says the CEO of Selective Search Inc., which is based in Chicago and has offices in 28 cities. Ms. Adler calls it a “party-line dating trend.”
Gone are the days when a Republican such as Mary Matalin might fall for a Democrat like James Carville, or vice versa.
“We’ve always screened for political views but now more than ever it’s showing up in the searches as a deal breaker if someone has polar-opposite viewpoints,” says Ms. Adler…
And I thought Obama was supposed to bring us all together…
I have dated liberals, conservatives and even (gasp!) apolitical types. I wouldn’t date someone who had a problem even dating a person who disagreed with him on issues.
To me, this is a no-brainer. Why would you want to marry somebody whose worldview is completely opposed to yours?
Ann Coulter said that Leftist women are screwed in the head because they have to deal with Leftist men.
I am divorced from a woman who had political views opposite of mine. She thought I was evil; I thought she was ignorant. Guess who was the Democrat.
When I was young, I would have seen signs of social conservatism or regular church attendance as signs that there would be no sex. Seems like Democrats always push the idea that Republicans want to outlaw sex outside of marriage. There is always some stupid statement from some Republican politician that make that strawman more plausible. Therefore it seemed perfectly rational to hide being a Republican and to ask heavy drinking lefty secular city girls out on a date while avoiding rural Christian girls who don’t drink.
In middle age I have less tolerance for left-leaning politics and view high levels of personal debt as a bigger red flag than signs that sex will have to wait for later. I can handle honest disagreements about the size and roll of government, but false premises arguments and Alinsky tactics drive me nuts. I once decided not to ask a woman out on another date when she mentioned she liked watching Olbermann.
“When I was young, I would have seen signs of social conservatism or regular church attendance as signs that there would be no sex.”
Just how exactly do you think us social conservative church going people have kids?
Sex- lots of it. With our spouses.
I don’t know of any social conservative that believes husbands and wives shouldn’t have lots of sex with each other, as long as it is behind closed doors, not on the front lawn…
Amen, HH!
You were right on the money. Unfortunately, it appears from George B’s comment that he was solely interested in sex, and looking in all the wrong places. LOL!
I get it, Jidcat! LOL!
To Helen Smith: Is that all you have to say on this issue? Or were you just advocating we all read the blog post from News Alert?
Anyhow, for me–if I were looking–not only would the man have to be as Conservative as I am, but he’d also have to be just as much a Christian. While I would not propose to be looking for a clone of myself, I would at least wish to be entangled with someone who would treat me with the same love and respect that I would treat him. And, the only way to find someone like that would be to look for someone with the same worldview.
Yes, I know EXACTLY how hard that is to find! (That’s why I quit looking many years ago.) I used to have a couple of lists to help me. One was a list of habits or behaviors that–once discovered–would cause me to break up with the man who had any of them. I knew any effort to ‘fix’ the issue would be futile and a waste of my time. This list included all manner of addictions and perverted behaviors that turned my stomach; it was a very long list indeed!
The other list was my ‘wish’ list. It was very short, and I never really got a chance to use it. My ‘elimination’ list was more effective, and I knew that if a man had one of the habits on the ‘elimination’ list, there was no way he’d have any character traits from my ‘wish’ list!
Yes, I developed some very high standards that I would not loosen. That is because I’d already experienced the pain that results from loose standards, and more than once! I did not want to go there again.
George B, it is obvious to me you were never looking for a relationship–whether long-term or otherwise. If all you want is sex, there are prostitutes in every city that can satisfy you. Yea, you have to pay for it, but that’s only fair; the gal’s gotta get SOMETHING worthwhile out of it!
Hey C.A.Bird, here’s a newsflash: There are women who enjoy sex even if they’re not getting ‘paid’.
Somehow George B can’t seem to find those women. That was his complaint. Sheesh! I wasn’t talking about very guy. I was talking TO George B!
A free ride home without a DWI has to count for something by anybody’s standards. The pleasure of my company for several hours and a serious rogering seem like something any woman ought to find delightful but I can understand how opinions might vary.
Gilligan,
George B was talking about trying to find women in CHURCH, not in bars. And, as with your predecessor, I remind you I was talking TO George, not about every man.
If necessary, I remind you that George B was complaining about not being able to find women who would sleep with him. Perhaps he has a problem. I was only trying to help him. Sheesh!
Back when they got together, it was still somewhat unusual. A standard topic at the time involved disbelief that two such opposite world views could co-exist.
Today, we are not merely two different factions, we are literally two hostile countries in one set of borders. Absent a DSM-IV diagnosis of 302.83, why would a conservative male wish to tie his entire life to someone whose basic outlook is that he is racist, sexist, and if she believes in a Deity [probably non-traditional], that he is an accomplice of whatever entity is the exact opposite. Especially since the legal environment in this country guarantees that the eventual separation will involve the male being looted and pillaged.
There is no point in getting involved with someone on the opposite political side. As it stands, the requirements of PC are such that even casual encounters bear a higher potential for unpleasantness, if not violence, than anything else.
Subotai Bahadur
Yeah, let’s see. I’m white, male, middle-aged, Southern, Christian, libertarian-conservative, and I work in the aerospace industry. Most leftists are opposed to the very existence of people like me. If I were single, why would I date someone who wants me dead?
I look at it as values compatibility. You need to have and live the same values in a relationship. If you don’t, you’re just asking for trouble.
If your word is good, if you are reliable and trustworthy, have a sense of fair play, you pay your debts, understand your civic duty and do it, understand your responsibilities and do them, are willing to be held accountable … then you call yourself whatever you want.
I’ve known quite a few so-called left-wing progressives who live very conservative lifestyles. It’s sort of a reverse hypocrisy — their professed values suck, but their lived values are excellent.
I have heard many Liberal Democrats say they would never date a Republican. My friend’s ex-roommate once said that she would never even be friends with a Republican. (She didn’t know I was one) I guess thats what liberals call tolerance and acceptance.