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Dr. Helen

Walter Russell Meade (via Instapundit): Male Suicide: Where’s the Outcry?:

Unemployed men are 126 percent more likely to kill themselves than their employed counterparts. And as we’ve written before, unemployed men are generally unappealing candidates for marriage, hurting their romantic prospects and increasing their sense of alienation. Unmarried men are a whopping 240 percent more likely to take their own lives than married men.

Perhaps most shocking about this story is the relative silence with which it has been met. If women were taking their lives in record numbers, largely due to their inability to find employment or husbands, you could bet that federal tribunals, support groups, and cries for policy change would abound. But thousands of men take their own life, lost in the shadows, and much of the press seem content to let the stories remain there.

I do want to point out that divorced and middle-aged men are also at a high risk for suicide and the reasons are often complex. From Forbes:

The study found that the suicide rate was ten times higher in men of lower socioeconomic status than in affluent men. The link between suicide and unemployment has been known for some time, but the authors discuss the reasons why, beyond losing a job, socioeconomic class might affect suicide risk. One factor is the increasing “‘feminisation’ of employment (shift towards a more service-oriented economy),” which may cause men to feel like they have less room in the professional world. The authors write that “men in lower socioeconomic groups now have less access to jobs that allow for the expression of working-class masculinity, and have thus lost a source of masculine identity and ‘pride.’” Yet losing a job may still make men feel like a “double failure, since they are unable to meet two central demands of the masculine role: being employed; and ‘providing’ for the family.”

Another interesting finding is that while divorce and separation are linked to suicide risk in both sexes, divorced/separated men seem particularly vulnerable to suicidal “ideation” (thoughts and planning) and to suicide itself.

This may make sense, since it’s been shown that men derive more mental and physical health benefits from marriage than do women (although it’s good for both sexes) – so the breakdown of a marriage could lead to more detrimental outcomes for men. That said, there’s still a lot of pressure on men to fill out the masculine husband role, whatever socioeconomic class one is in, and the reality is that today this classic role may be somewhat unrealistic. “There is a large and unbridgeable gap between the culturally authorised idea of ‘hegemonic masculinity’ and the reality of everyday survival for men in crisis,” write the authors. One way of taking back one’s own masculinity, they suggest, is to take one’s own life.

Could men be taking their own lives to take back their masculinity? It’s an interesting theory but not a solution.

Comments are closed.

Top Rated Comments   
So what's the problem? This is the Feminist Utopia. Manly men deprived of their masculinity are offing themselves . . . feminism must be doing backflips.

Women, in general, don't care about the issue anyway, unless it has a direct impact on their personal life. After forty years of war on masculinity and male interests, the ultimate way for Men to Go Their Own Way is with a bullet in the brain . . . but American femininity is more concerned about the Kardashians.

Fellas, don't pull the trigger . . . find the Manosphere and get some help. That's what we're there for.
48 weeks ago
48 weeks ago Link To Comment
Older unemployed men are more likely to kill themselves because society views them as worthless.

It's just like if a cute woman got in a car accident and got a disfigured face.

Her looks were her source of importance in life, and control over others, and her source of money via men.

Same thing. Men are judged on their utility (to women).
48 weeks ago
48 weeks ago Link To Comment
Yes, there is a selection bias here because the worst-off men are extremely unlikely to ever get married.

Also, all the benefits of marriage to men turn into massive liabilities the minute she divorces him, which statistically has a greater than 50% chance to happen. (Divorce rate + likelihood of female-initiated divorce.)

At that point, his wealth becomes a liability and he is something like 10 times more likely to suicide than women getting a divorce.

The smart move for men is to not marry.
48 weeks ago
48 weeks ago Link To Comment
All Comments   (49)
All Comments   (49)
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How many suicides are missed? I have no doubt that many men disguise their suicide as an accident to shield their children and loved ones from the truth and for monetary (insurance) reasons.
48 weeks ago
48 weeks ago Link To Comment
I don't have a psychology degree. I don't work in the healthcare industry. I have a basic liberal arts education, and over twenty one years in the government workforce.

Yet I can tell you that sometimes suicide is not the worst case scenario. I don't advocate suicide in most cases, but in some cases it would have been a better option than the other lashing out behaviors which can manifest in people. Simply look at the number of murder suicides or mass killings perpetrated by disturbed individuals. In any of those cases I have no problem saying society as a whole would have been better off if the killer had decided to start and stop with just themselves. How much of this suicide rate is composed of people who have decided to do just that rather than slaying a classroom full of children?

Is it society which is to blame? Personally I'm tired of that liberal claptrap excuse. Own up to your responsibility to make yourself a responsible citizen of your society. Don't rob, murder, and steal from your fellow citizens. Don't strike out and harm other people because you are in pain. Suicide is nothing more than someone lashing out to hurt other people because they are feeling hurt themselves.

Certainly we can discuss the inadequacy of men's health care in this country. No doubt that in a miserable repressive society which puts more weight on the concerns of women, that men feel stifled and unable to express themselves for fear of violating a PC police barrier regarding their behavior.

It would be easy to say "suck it up", but there does come a time when there simply is no more that can be done by repressing ourselves to meet an unnatural conformity of behavior. Stop trying to train little boys to act like little girls, allow men to actually be themselves while women are still free to be themselves as well.

Unfortunately the "industry" of psychiatric care is too closely tied to the "industry" of pharmacutical treatment. When your favorite tool is a pill which alters the way the human mind works, is it any wonder that you start treating every individual problem like it can be treated with your universal pill "hammer".

Call me a loon if you like, but I'm very insistent with each of my healthcare providers that I will not use any of their psychoactive substances. Antibiotics, blood pressure meds, cholesteral meds, etc, are all no problem. Keep your psychiatric mind altering substances to yourself. How much of this problem of lunitic killers and suicides are the result of people under mind altering substances who suffer an unexpected "imbalance" which is subsequently covered up by the responsible industries.
48 weeks ago
48 weeks ago Link To Comment
Just a bit of friendly advice, when a medical or psychiatric professional perscribes a medication, get the information sheets and read the warnings very carefully. If "risk of depression or suicide" is on the list, then ask for an alternative medication.
48 weeks ago
48 weeks ago Link To Comment
Can't speak for others, but using power tools and building stuff is very important to my mental health. Need to do something to overcome the effects of working long hours in a cubicle farm. I looked at some houses where the HOA basically outlaws many of the things I do to relax. No thanks! The neighborhoods with no HOA were definitely more man-friendly. Maybe, in the effort to support higher property values and good schools, we've eliminated many productive opportunities to be a man.

My neighbor across the alley helped with the "car ministry" in his church. Men in this group would help members of the congregation repair their cars. This both saved money and empowered people with new skills and a sense of accomplishment. I guarantee that the men in the upscale golf subdivisions didn't get the same sense of accomplishment hitting a white ball around a manicured yard.
48 weeks ago
48 weeks ago Link To Comment
I looked on the internet, called help lines and was told to go the nearest hospital for my suicidal thoughts. Guess what, they sent me to jail!
48 weeks ago
48 weeks ago Link To Comment
Warren Farrell covered all this ground so much better decades ago in his books Why Men Are The Way They Are and The Myth Of Male Power.

There's all kinds of programs to take care of troubled females. There's even the SPCA for taking in stray dogs. But for men there's... well, other than jail, what? Farrell identified it as our shameful culture of Male Disposability.
48 weeks ago
48 weeks ago Link To Comment
I don't think it's "taking back masculinity," Smith. With due respect, I think you're making a stereotypical female mistake there. It's *women* for whom identity issues ("Who am I?") are paramount.

For men it is role issues ("What do I do?") issues that dominate. So you have to look at the roles they're in. As someone who's given it more than one thought, I would surmise that those who pull the trigger, so to speak, are those for whom their role has degenerated to dumb host for a load of parasites. And the decision has more to do with simply shaking off the parasites -- with liberation. Being free, at last.
48 weeks ago
48 weeks ago Link To Comment
When I met my wife, she was actually challenging me about who between us would earn the most, and when.

As soon as we married, she left the regular workforce to concentrate on her "entrepreneurism." She likes a nice house. She wants to be an "entrepreneur." I am left to pay, oh, all the actual bills.

Since then the bills have mounted. I tell her on a regular basis that (a) the current spend rate is not sustainable, and (b) the level of debt I am sustaining is driving me to consider suicide.

She really doesn't appear to care.

Sooner or later, this load will become unsustainable, and I will commit suicide. It's coming. I know it.

I hate women.
48 weeks ago
48 weeks ago Link To Comment
Seriously-???You actually believe that women are one giant hive-mind, and therefore your wife being a thoughtless parasite means it's OK to hate "women", not just her and any woman supporting her/cheering her on-????

Divorce the &*%$# , and do it yesterday! That will hurt her (so far as I can tell from your post, if she's as narcissistic as she seems from it ) way more than would your suicide.

48 weeks ago
48 weeks ago Link To Comment
Other than the "I hate women" part, I could have written this comment. My solution? Take half of any saving you have, go to another bank, and open new accounts in just your name. Pay everything but what she spends on. Leave that for her. Her gas, car payment, credit cards... her problem. When she had to get a job just to pay for her gas, I started adding the household bills to her list. First the elect bill, then the AT&T bill. In the first 4 months of her working I have 20,000 saved in the bank.

If you have a plan, get started
48 weeks ago
48 weeks ago Link To Comment
I'll add my agreement to jmarie and KentN. I married at 20 and divorced at 40, with little money and 3 kids to support. At 58, my life (and my children's) is far, far better than I could ever have imagined - even during the brief time that I was 'happily' married. If I knew then what I know now, I would have gladly relived over and over again the trouble of ridding myself of that miserable shrew.
48 weeks ago
48 weeks ago Link To Comment
Patrick, you need to do more than tell her. Please seek legal advice and don't give up, she is not worth it, but you are.

I agree with KentN, being in a bad relationship can feel like you are just waiting to die, but being free is like being reborn. Don't give up, please!
48 weeks ago
48 weeks ago Link To Comment
Why did you marry this person?
48 weeks ago
48 weeks ago Link To Comment
I wouldn't give your life for someone like that - they will simply market the tragedy to find someone else to suck dry.
My ex was much like your wife, and she ran off with another man who was also married, but he had two kids. He deserves her. I am free now. Don't give up hope. It will hurt like hell to loose her - parasite removal often causes discomfort. But you will have so much energy and life when she stops being your problem. It will be like tasting oxygen for the first time. Hang in there.
48 weeks ago
48 weeks ago Link To Comment
We call this Greenspan's Body Count:

http://greenspansbodycount.blogspot.com/
48 weeks ago
48 weeks ago Link To Comment
So what's the problem? This is the Feminist Utopia. Manly men deprived of their masculinity are offing themselves . . . feminism must be doing backflips.

Women, in general, don't care about the issue anyway, unless it has a direct impact on their personal life. After forty years of war on masculinity and male interests, the ultimate way for Men to Go Their Own Way is with a bullet in the brain . . . but American femininity is more concerned about the Kardashians.

Fellas, don't pull the trigger . . . find the Manosphere and get some help. That's what we're there for.
48 weeks ago
48 weeks ago Link To Comment
Suicide is a coward's choice. There's nothing masculine about it.

This "theory" is not intersting, in fact it's rather insulting. What these articles reveal is a complete cultural misunderstanding of what it means to be a man.

Of course some males commit suicide, but that certainly doesn't make them men. Males commit suicide at a higher rate than females, and this proves exactly what? That the culture, the marriage contract and the court system drive them to it.

Spare me your sob stories. Divorced, depressed, deprived, unemployed, whatever, suicide is the only sin that cannot be forgiven, because there can be no confession.

A friend of mine killed himself a couple of years ago. I came home from work, and he was standing outside. He waved me over, but I had more work to do on my computer. He asked me to call him, and I said that I would. But I didn't. I had to enter this information on these houses. An hour later I heard the shot from across the drive.

Yeah, he blew his brains out. Why, I don't know. He had money. His family owns a chain of appliance stores. He had a nice condo. He wasn't married or divorced. He wasn't having any problems with the girl he was dating. But obviously he was troubled about something, what I have no idea.

He wanted someone to talk to. He turned to me. I couldn't talk to him at that time. I had more work to do. And before I could call him, he killed himself.

I've often wondered that if I had gone over there and talked to him, whether he would be alive today. I don't know, maybe, maybe not.

But he didn't eat his gun to prove that he was a man. He did it to show that he was troubled.

We live in a sick society. Men are denigrated. Men are exploited. Men are abondoned, betrayed and bankrupted.

Hey, brother, suck it up. If you're unemployed, find another job. Doesn't matter what it is. If your girlfriend breaks up with you, get over it and find another. If your wife divorces you, well, that's a lot more expensive. But you married her. You agreed to the terms and conditions of the marriage contract, out of some misguided sense of romance. And the court will show no mercy on you for that.

Males kill themselves for all sorts of reasons. Being a man is not one of them.

What I think is going on is media propaganda. Men are worthless. Men are unemployed. Men are living in their mother's basement. It gets to be redundant after a while.

Being a man means taking responsibility. Suicide is not a responsibility; it's a coward's choice.

But in this culture, under the terms and conditions of this marriage contract, in this court system, in this economy, why would you expect any male to survive? Think of it as way late term abortion.

Men survive. That's what we do. We improvise, adapt and overcome. When men get serious about changing the terms and conditions of the marriage contract, the law, all of this will go away. Because then women will not have a bludgeon to batter you with. Until such time, you have no chance in court.

Hey, take her out. Buy her dinner and drinks. If she wants to have sex, take her to a hotel. It's that simple. Just don't marry her, or you will regret it.
48 weeks ago
48 weeks ago Link To Comment
Spare you your stories within a post exploring the ideas of why men commit suicide? Then shaming shaming shaming, while sharing your own story?

Yeah. Bravo. I mean, just bravo.

No one knows what's on the other side, but the people who do this are "cowards". If this was a one way trip past some veil in space exploration it would be heroic and honorable. Charging a machine gun emplacement is heroic, not suicidal.

At some point, things become too much, and it may not be a solution you favor, but it is a solution. Pretending you're above the human condition and therefore more manly than most, only means you're unable to process that not everyone thinks like you.
48 weeks ago
48 weeks ago Link To Comment
So you're wondering whether your friend may (or may not) have killed himself because you didn't make the time to talk to him. Then you tell people like Patrick above to "suck it up" and call him a coward. What's wrong with this picture?

Also, I'll assume you're Catholic or Eastern Orthodox, since there's not much else out there faith-wise that subscribes to a sacrament of penance the way you describe it.

One of the biggest problems I have with feminism, Marxism, et al, are the pseudo-religious dogma that I'm expected to "accept and believe" just because someone is yelling it at me. What you're offering doesn't sound much better.

There are/were cultures in the world where ritual suicide was a way to die with one's honor intact (Harakiri/Seppuku in Japan, for instance). I think it's possible that some men may check out because it may seem to them more honorable than the alternative - an ignominious existence. And then there are all of the other reasons, as well.
48 weeks ago
48 weeks ago Link To Comment
I offer you the opportunity to copulate with yourself, and then with the horse upon which you seem to have rode in. Upon.
48 weeks ago
48 weeks ago Link To Comment
It sounds to me like you are trying to justify your actions by attacking his.
48 weeks ago
48 weeks ago Link To Comment
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