News & Politics

Samantha Bee Apologizes for Apologizing for Calling Ivanka Trump a [C-Word]

Samantha Bee, host of "Full Frontal with Samantha Bee," poses at an Emmy For Your Consideration screening of the television talk show at the Writers Guild Theatre in Beverly Hills, Calif. (Photo by Chris Pizzello/Invision/AP, File)

To recap: Last week, former TV comedienne Samantha Bee called Ivanka Trump a “c*nt” for cuddling her own baby instead of somehow forcing her father to do what Samantha Bee wants. Here’s what that looked like.

Somebody on Bee’s show wrote that line, and somebody on her show approved that line, and somebody on her show wrote it on her teleprompter, and somebody on her show filmed her as she read it out loud. And somebody at TBS saw the result and said, “Yeah, okay. Let’s go with that.” They all had an entire week to put together an episode of a current events show, and that was the best they could do.

Then a lot of people got angry. Then the advertisers on Bee’s show started to do what her father should have done back in the ’60s: pull out. So, having no other choice, she defecated this apology:

And the network emitted this one:

Are you picking up on the complete and utter sincerity?

That seemed to do that trick. Bee kept most of her advertisers, and she’s in no danger of losing her job. So, with that little inconvenience out of the way, she no longer needs to pretend she’s sorry. She no longer needs to concede anything to the people she hates. She can now apologize… for apologizing.

“I’m very sorry, and I truly and completely apologize. But, c’mon… aren’t you people the real problem?” That’s not an apology. And if you don’t like being told so, I’m not sorry.

Yeah, Samantha Bee would do anything to help those kids. And “anything” encompasses literally all possible things, which includes calling Ivanka a “c*nt” and claiming she’s having an incestuous relationship with her father.

I’m glad Samantha Bee has now revoked her apology. I’m glad people like Jon Stewart and Kathy Griffin are making excuses for her. I’m glad she genuinely believes she didn’t do anything wrong because she just hates her enemies so much.

I’m glad it’s out in the open!

I didn’t vote for Trump, and I don’t care about the crybabies who whine whenever I point out that I didn’t vote for Trump. But I also don’t hate the people who did vote for him. I don’t agree with all their reasoning, and I don’t like a lot of the things they do and say. But I don’t hate them, no matter how much some of them hate me. I understand that they did what they thought they had to do. They’re not destroying America, or doing Putin’s bidding, or bringing back Jim Crow, or any of that insane crap. They voted in a free and fair election and their candidate won. If some of ’em still can’t get over it, that’s not my problem.

But Samantha Bee hates them. That hate has stripped her of reason, to the extent that she was capable of reason in the first place. And it’s making her less and less funny by the week. There was a time when I wouldn’t have believed it was possible for Samantha Bee to be even worse at comedy, but these are strange days.

Now, I know what the #Resistance is saying right now. “Why do you care so much about Samantha Bee calling Ivanka Trump a c*nt, when Ted Nugent called Hillary Clinton a c*nt and you didn’t say anything?” If you’re telling me that Bee is no better than Nugent, then I concede the point.

And if you’re a proud MAGA drain-the-swamp deplorable who’s howling for Bee’s job, I’d urge you to reconsider. If you approve of the results of the 2016 presidential election and you don’t want to see the Democrats stage a comeback, then you should welcome voices like Samantha Bee. You should encourage her to keep doing what she’s doing. You should applaud her as she alienates you even further, and drives more and more people away from her political party. You should be glad she’s doing this, and that so many of her comrades are cheering her on. This is good news.

For the GOP.

Samantha Bee didn’t get The Daily Show when Jon Stewart left. She was passed over, just like Hillary in ’08, because “Young Black Dude” was higher on the victimhood pyramid than “Old White Lady.” But she can still keep doing her part to get Republicans elected.

I hope she learns absolutely none of the right lessons from this. Why should she start now?