TORIES DROP TO 7% AND BREXIT PARTY SOARS TO 37% IN FINAL POLLING BEFORE EUROPEAN ELECTIONS.

Related: The Brexit Party Poses an Existential Threat to the Tories.

Watching MPs acting out these calculations, including maneuvers by about 20 Tory ministers, some quite obscure, to offer themselves as the next prime minister, I’m reminded of the 1970s movie poster for Jaws 2 showing a pretty bikini-clad water-skier blithely cresting the waves as, unseen behind her, a huge shark is erupting from the water and about to swallow her up. The shark in question is wearing a pinstriped suit and its name is Nigel Farage. The pretty young thing represents the mainstream parties, especially Labour and the Tories.

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With only two days to go before the polls open, Farage was given three boosts that most politicians can only daydream about: a milkshake was poured over him by a bearded Leftie; the prime minister obligingly broke a major promise not to hold a second referendum on Brexit, as if to remind the voters why they were opposing her and supporting him; and an establishment quango, the Electoral Commission, having given the Brexit party a clean bill of health on its financing the week before, responded to an evidence-free demand from former Labour prime minister Gordon Brown that the party’s finances should be investigated for illegal contributions by returning to its offices two days before the election and going through its books again for several hours and finding nothing wrong — almost as if there were, you know, an establishment conspiracy against Farage, Brexit, and the party bearing its name. In fact, there’s almost a conspiracy of events to help them.

In America, veteran leftwing talk radio host Bill Press is the latest to endorse splattering your opponents with chemicals and liquids: Bill Press on ‘Milkshaking’ of Farage — ‘I Love That Idea’ and Hope it Comes to US.

Yeah, but one doubts that Press and Ogburn would find the practice nearly so amusing had the attorney general getting assaulted been Eric Holder. And just imagine the faux outrage they’d summon if the target was Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (or “Occasional-Cortex,” as stated by the great Andrew Klavan at The Daily Wire), or one of those poor defenseless Democrats running for president.

If heaving a milkshake at a politician is fair game, how about coffee? Or paint, as long as it’s watercolors. Surely a pebble or two couldn’t do much harm, providing that the recipient removes his glasses in time. And is there really much difference between pebbles and slightly larger stones, as long as they’re thrown from a distance? After all, these are hated politicians we’re talking about and this is just another form of dissent, albeit assaultive. Right? Right …?

Or as Ace of Spades warns the media, “The rules you make for me, you also make for yourself.”