To paraphrase Hunter S. Thompson, when the going gets weird, the weird turn to numerology.
Louis Farrakhan believes that the hidden mysteries of the number 19 explain how The Man is keeping him down. Similarly, Lincoln Chafee, the longtime RINO who made it official by going over to the left and launched a quixotic presidential bid, knows what’s keeping America as a whole down — our steadfast hatred of the metric system:
Chafee, a Republican-turned-independent-turned-Democrat, gave a brief and chipper address that called for America to re-engage with “international community” with diplomacy and “symbolic” moves. That meant everything from barring campaign donors from becoming diplomats, to allowing Edwardowd Snen to come home without punishment, to bringing America into the Metric system.
“It doesn’t take long to realize that 34 degrees is hot,” joked Chafee, reminiscing about some time he spent in Canada.
What a poseur, as the French-Canadians would say.
If Chafee was actually serious about promoting the ridiculous measurement system of the murderous French revolution, he would taken a cue from another Canadian and issued his press release outlining his proposal written in Dan Aykroyd’s crazed “Decabet” language from the first season of NBC’s Saturday Night Live:
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