News You Can Use

(Image courtesy IBT)

Um:

A halal sex shop that will sell “Islamically approved” adult products exclusively to Muslims will be opened in the Saudi city of Mecca.

According to a report published in Alyaoum24, an Arabic news portal, the shops will “strictly cater to Muslim customers in Mecca” and are being opened after due consultation with Saudi clerics, who have approved it as ‘halal’.

Abdelaziz Aouragh, who is the owner of a Dutch halal sex shop called El Asira, will open the halal sex shop in Mecca. El Asira is famous for its sensual oils.

I plan on opening a shop next door selling t-shirts that read, “My husband went on hadj and all I got was this lousy t-shirt.”