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Helen Smith

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July 14, 2011 - 11:30 am

Over at the Daily Mail, there is an article on “the burnt-out generation.” The word “generation” would imply that it would include men, but no, the article is about how women work too hard at home and work. The piece discusses a book by Dr. Joan Borysenko who wrote Fried: Why You Burn Out and How to Revive and she had this to say:

Dr Borysenko believes women suffer so severely because they are more likely than men to be people-pleasers who ignore their own needs.

Trapped in a cycle of trying to do their best, but not realising the toll it’s taking on them, they end up in a cycle of despair.

‘Burn-out is a disorder of hope. It sucks the life out of competent, hard-working people. You lose motivation and vitality,’ says Dr Borysenko, a Harvard-trained scientist and psychologist.

‘It happens when you feel you can’t stand it for one more minute. You have such thoughts as: “I hate my life.” ….

Dr Borysenko says women close to burn-out often put themselves last on their own list.

‘Women in burn-out exhaust themselves by doing, doing, doing,’ she says. They also become cynical and negative about life. Feeling relentlessly put-upon creates a martyr complex and a raging sense of resentment and indignation that often makes burn-out victims feel justified in lashing out…

She is worried about the toll on mothers trying to do it all, especially now that a job is no longer a matter of choice for many, but is instead essential to keeping the family finances afloat.

Funny, feminists have always told women they “could have it all.” Now that they do, they are all a bunch of martyrs, no different than the way the 1950s housewives were described by feminists. Have you noticed that women are always portrayed as a bunch of martyrs who “never put themselves first,” no matter the circumstances? The solution to their woes always seems to be to get more “me time.”

I often watch men drag themselves to work or do things that call for sacrifice without complaining or sometimes, they have a heart attack or other health problem that no one really cares about and certainly, they get little sympathy.

Men are also adapting to new roles and doing much more in the home as well as working. People just call that “life” if you’re a man. If you are a woman who works too hard, you are “burnt-out” and need help. Maybe “burnt-out” is just another phrase that means “work like a man.” Feminists and their suck-ups are always saying that women are “superior” to men, but when I read articles like this one, I’m not so sure.

Helen Smith is a psychologist specializing in forensic issues in Knoxville, Tennessee, and blogs at Dr. Helen.
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