IT’S PRETTY MUCH INDISTINGUISHABLE FROM JOE BIDEN’S: Amazingly Preserved Brain Discovered in 2,600-year-old Severed Head. “Found inside the skull of an unfortunate Iron Age man in his 30s who was hung, then decapitated with his head quickly ending up in the swampy pit, the ancient gray matter is still soft, ‘tofu-like in texture,’ and odorless, with no signs of bacterial or fungal activity.”

UPDATE: Reader Rachel Rudensky writes: “I must have a dirty mind, because I had to read the following post at least three times before I understood that the writer meant to say ‘hanged.’ . . . I literally wondered how they could tell from the fossil evidence.”

You know, I almost commented on that but I was afraid I’d sound pedantic. Little did I know that I’d wind up inflaming my female readers’ loins with Iron Age lust. . . .