Sitting stuffed inside an airplane with hundreds of random strangers is not really anyone's idea of a good time, but it's the price we pay to arrive quickly at our destinations.
Over the years, I've had a few obnoxious experiences. Once, I flew from Los Angeles to Atlanta with a random little boy next to me. He was about six or seven years old, and his mother sat two aisles back and diagonally from us. I felt like a babysitter. He talked, requested I share my snacks, and asked me questions during most of the flight. When I finally decided to put on my headphones, he asked if he could listen to them when I was finished. "Sure," I said, never taking them off again until we landed.
In 2023, I was flying home from Costa Rica during spring break season, and the plane was so full that it felt like we were packed in like sardines. I had the aisle seat, and I kept accidentally elbowing the lady next to me because the flight was pretty turbulent. Initially, I'd apologize, but then I realized the lady didn't care — she was too busy coughing, sneezing, and blowing her nose. A few days later, I had COVID.
Ever since that incident, I've tried to fly first class if I can. It may cost a few extra dollars, but to me, it's worth it, and it has made my flying experiences much more pleasant. I also like to pick my seat in advance and know exactly where I'll be when I board. On the rare occasion I've been asked to move or switch seats, I don't do it. That just doesn't feel like a "me" problem.
And that's exactly why, when I heard this story, I sided with the woman telling it immediately. But I'd love to know what you think, dear PJ Media readers.
You may have seen it, as it's gone pretty viral across social media.
Travel blogger Tomiko Harvey was on a flight from Istanbul to Washington, D.C., recently. She'd been in Kazakhstan and was flying home because her father had died. She had an aisle seat for the long-haul flight. The woman next to her in the middle seat asked if Harvey could trade places with her because she "missed her husband."
Harvey said no. And who can blame her? I wouldn't want to be stuck in a middle seat for 10 hours either. Harvey claimed the woman then cried for three hours straight. Three hours! Harvey said at some point she asked the woman if she'd had a death in her own family. The woman said no, she just wanted to rest her head on her husband's shoulder.
Here's what's kind of funny: Harvey claimed the woman's husband was "two rows up, in a middle seat with his headphones on, sleeping in heavenly peace the entire flight." If that is true, it sounds like this woman just didn't want the middle seat. Harvey called it the "ultimate white tears," and while I didn't appreciate her making it about race, it does sound like this lady was a bit unhinged.
It seems like most people who commented on Harvey's Instagram post sided with her decision. A few said she was being mean or rude, and some joked that the woman's husband must have booked the seats like this on purpose so he could get some peace and quiet.
Apparently, most travel etiquette experts agree that Harvey did nothing wrong. Ultimately, it's okay to ask someone to switch seats, but you should be prepared for them to say no. After all, they went to all the trouble to purposely select and pay for them in most cases. There may be situations where swapping is a kind gesture. For example, someone may be traveling with a child and would like to sit next to the child; swap only if you won't be uncomfortable in the new seat. The examples I read included moving from a window or aisle seat to the middle, especially if you're a larger person or you're claustrophobic.
Danny Karon, a consumer advocacy attorney and law professor, told Travel + Leisure that, legally, you have every right to refuse a requested swap: "Your airline ticket is a contract, and it entitles you to sit in the seat you purchased and is assigned to you. Full stop. So in no way are you a 'bad person' for using a product you purchased."
So, what say you? Was Harvey right or just being a mean girl to this "poor woman" who supposedly just wanted to rest her head on her husband's shoulder?
