These articles are my favorite to write. Not only are they full of good news for us, but just imagine the shrill squeals that come from the agony of defeat emanating from green-haired, scrotum-hating, sideshow slobs in hipster coffee shops, located in every Warsaw-ghetto-looking American city nationwide. Squeal, you commie piggies, SQUEAL.

Let’s start with the one we’ve all been waiting/praying/sacrificing roosters for: Hillary is getting spanked in a courtroom this week.

The carnage is so delicious even CNN had to admit it.

As I have mentioned before, I am a New Wave Republican. I don’t turn the other cheek, nor do I forgive and forget as easily as some of our more religious friends do. I want to see this she-demon perp-walked into the same D.C. gulag holding peaceful J6 protestors. I hope she gets the cell with the broken toilet and her stomach has a bad reaction to chipped beef.

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In a nutshell, here is what happened in court:

Hillary tweeted the lie on Halloween, 2016, less than a week before the election.

Hillary has tweeted nothing about the damning testimony. I guess if her political career is finished she can audition for the role of Flo’s evil grandmother in those Progressive Insurance commercials.

Hillary Clinton
Democratic National Convention via AP

Elon Musk has been throwing some dukes at the libs lately, even Hillary. The left loved him and his electric cars. Now that he is buying Twitter and, my God, threatening to allow FREE SPEECH on the once-liberal lie app, they spit-scream at their phones every time he tweets something juicy like this:

And wouldn’t you know it, now that Elon Musk is for free speech and voting Republican, here come the attacks. Though no woman ever accused Elon of anything when he was voting for Donkeys, someone now claims he exposed himself to her.

Here is his response;

FACT-O-RAMA! Elon Musk is a fighter who doesn’t care what the toilet people on the left throw at him. I’m thrilled he is on our side!

But wait, there’s more! Six more reasons to smile a little brighter this weekend:

If these aren’t good enough reasons to light up a cigar and pour a glass of 1776 bourbon, I don’t know is.

P.S.: I heard a rumor that the pink-hairs are going to hit the steps at the Supreme Court on Monday after they hear something they won’t like. Pop some corn, it’s gonna be a hoot!