I was sucked into watching the TLC show Sex Sent Me to the ER last night after flipping through the channels and realizing that this was the best I was going to do on a weekend night. If you have never watched the show (good for you), it has three or so couples, each describing how their sexual escapades sent them to the ER and an ER doc will also narrate the situation. In the episode last night, a couple like variety and decide to heat up a large gummy bear (made of sugar, of course) and the woman begs the guy to pour it on her chest and eat it off. He does and it gives her third degree burns and his mouth is burned. They head to the ER where he is blamed for hurting his girlfriend and is given shaming looks.
Another couple has consensual sex in a pool naked and the woman gets her toe ring caught in the drain. The guy has to pull her leg to free her foot and she screams and all of her friends run to the pool to see what is going on and ask her if her boyfriend is hurting her. She goes to the ER where she is afraid of being shamed and tells her boyfriend that she is angry that he made her do it. Really? This lady looked to weigh over 300 pounds. Is she so weak that she cannot say no to sex in a pool? This nonsense where women and society pretend women are coerced into sex and men are the perps is getting old.
Another segment showed a man hauled into the ER on a gurney. He says he was “cleaning” and fell 30 feet from a window. He has broken a number of bones and the hospital calls his wife even though he does not want her there. A crazy frizzy-haired woman comes in and upon hearing from police that there looked to be more than cleaning going on, starts beating her husband.
The doctor passively stands back while his patient is beaten and talks about how he does not want to get involved. Finally, security is called and the wife is hauled away. The man has a heart attack and tells the doctor the truth: he had a hooker, was doing cocaine, tried to write a check but the hooker got angry and threw him naked from a third floor window. The doctor hopes he has learned his lesson. Wow, imagine if a man for any reason threw a woman from three floors. And would the doc have stood back if a woman was being beaten by a husband for cheating? Somehow, I doubt it.
Why are the men blamed and shamed for anything that goes wrong in a sexual encounter? Women are active participants as you can see if you watch the video below (about the couple and the gummy bear) but somehow, it is always just the man’s fault.