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Obama's first post-Wisconsin fundraiser "memejacked" by S.F. Tea Party

But where was the legendary, game-changing Occupy Wall Street movement, the left-wing replacement for the Tea Party?

Here it was. Or, at least a single woman wearing an "Occupy Oakland" t-shirt. Aside from that, they were notably absent. Theories as to why:

a. They already now agree with most of Obama's policies, so there'd be no reason to protest him;

b. The Occupy movement is basically extinct and irrelevant;

c. They still exist, but they're a bunch of flaky losers who can't get their act together;

d. They have better things to do, like breaking windows and stealing farmland.

Any alternate theories? I vote for a, b, c and d.

The lone Occupier briefly got in a shouting match with a young Tea Partier, but no one else joined in and so the tiff rapidly faded.

Another World Can't Waiter explains to a reporter, very very calmly, why he's against President Obama's drone assassination program.

World Can't Wait used their megaphone to endlessly eviscerate Obama over his "illegal" drone strike program, while just steps away the Tea Party eviscerated him over his fiscal policies. There was a brief verbal tussle over whose Obama criticisms were more important, but this fight also lasted just a short time and the two otherwise bitter political opponents coexisted for the afternoon, content to let Obama take crossfire from all directions, and to minimize friendly fire in the Big Tent anti-Obama Camp.

Even so, I can't endure a Mercedes Benz logo passing for a peace sign on a leftist banner. Why oh why can't they get their own symbol right?

The security precautions at this event were interesting. Because the century-old Merchants' Exchange building was built, per the style back then, right up to the sidewalk, this unfortunately makes it vulnerable to truck-bomb attacks; to forestall this possibility, the Secret Service ordered two huge dump-trucks to block the street, to prevent kamikaze drivers from even entering the block.

Meanwhile, on rooftops around the building, police snipers scanned the crowds for malefactors.

"You want to go where? I don't think so. Move along."

Your picture-perfect San Francisco postcard for the day. Even the cable cars were stopped in their tracks, and had to retreat back up through Chinatown.

There was a brief flurry of excitement as a celebrity showed up. Was it Obama? Awwwww, no; it was just Lt. Governor (and former SF Mayor) Gavin Newsom showing up to greet Obama. Drat!

And then the crowd's catcalls suddenly increased in volume, indicating the arrival of The One, riding the same limousine from the other event. But he quickly turned left, as I knew he would, into the side alley with the tent, so he never even drove past the crowd. Most people, however, could not get a good view of what happened.

As a result, when the decoy limousine parked directly in front of the crowd, everyone went berserk, expecting Obama to emerge. But it was all a ruse.

He was instead already inside the building, "digging for more gold," as one Tea Partier put it.

"This account is overdrawn. Please try again after you have balanced the budget."

Michelle's free-spending ways also came under attack.

Screw Occupy and their lame "99%" gimmick. This is the meme that changed the American political landscape.

The leftists, meanwhile, mostly inhabited their own universe.

The campaign begins in earnest today!

Bonus links:

Full transcript of Obama’s SF fundraiser at the Merchants' Exchange

SFGate: Obama scoops up $2 million at 2 SF events

More photos from the event at the City Square blog.

And more photos from the Fund47 blog.

SFGate: The buzz on Obama’s latest SF trip

List of celebrities at the second fundraiser.