02-22-2019 04:41:18 PM -0800
02-21-2019 02:04:47 PM -0800
02-21-2019 11:01:19 AM -0800
02-20-2019 06:05:04 PM -0800
02-20-2019 04:41:47 PM -0800
It looks like you've previously blocked notifications. If you'd like to receive them, please update your browser permissions.
Desktop Notifications are  | 
Get instant alerts on your desktop.
Turn on desktop notifications?
Remind me later.
PJ Media encourages you to read our updated PRIVACY POLICY and COOKIE POLICY.

Stretch, grab a late afternoon cup of caffeine and get caught up on the most important news of the day with our Coffee Break newsletter. These are the stories that will fill you in on the world that's spinning outside of your office window - at the moment that you get a chance to take a breath.
Sign up now to save time and stay informed!

Doctor of Feminist Studies Gropes 10k Dogs to Study 'Rape Culture' at Dog Parks

Close up of dogs face

If you’re not following @RealPeerReview on Twitter, you’re really missing out. The account, run by anonymous moderators, posts real abstracts from far-left-wing researcher papers. The thread they posted last Thursday is pure gold.

The author of the article in question is Helen Wilson, Ph.D. She holds a doctorate in feminist studies and is the lead researcher at the Portland Ungendering Research Initiative. Her paper is entitled, “Human reactions to rape culture and queer performativity at urban dog parks in Portland, Oregon.” Since that doesn’t actually mean anything, and performativity isn’t even a word, I’ll summarize: She hung around some dogs parks for a year and watched a ton of dogs having sex.

Wilson goes on to say a couple more incomprehensible things like “human geographies” and “geographies of sexuality” and to call dog owners “human companions” before revealing three questions that her article will attempt to answer. Here they are:

1. How do human companions manage, contribute, and respond to violence in dogs?

2. What issues surround queer performativity and human reaction to homosexual sex between and among dogs?

3. Do dogs suffer oppression based upon (perceived) gender?

She then explains that she will apply “Black feminist criminology categories” (to what, I don’t know) and will suggest “practical applications” to disrupt “hegemonic masculinities” and improve access to “emancipatory spaces.” The author then helpfully introduces us to the concept of the “oppressive human with relationship to that of the oppressed dog, which is subject to the often speciesist, typically anthropocentric hegemonic presence of the human subject.”

I feel the need to remind you here that this is a real paper written by a real person who really says things like “speciesist, typically anthropocentric hegemonic presence of the human subject” with a straight face and believes that dogs are oppressed by humans. (Excuse me while I go help my dog with her protest sign.)

Wilson then gets into the highly serious, not at all hilarious details of her research. She begins by telling us that “throughout this work the word ‘rape’ describes human perceptions of dogs forcefully penetrating other dogs who have given no indication of wish to engage in sexual activity.” Of course, Wilson feels she must acknowledge that “because of my own situatedness, as a human, rather than a dog, I recognize my limitation in being able to determine when an incidence of dog humping qualifies as rape.” (Yup, she just said “dog humping” and “rape” in the same sentence. Also situatedness isn’t a word.)

Okay, so she’s sitting there at the dog park, watching a bunch of dogs getting it on, and trying to figure out which ones are being raped and which ones asked for it. Got it. So, now she tells us how, exactly, she accomplished this: “my approach was to sit or walk around the dog park, observe, take notes, talk with people or inspect dogs, and then inconspicuously leave.” I wasn’t sure, at first, what “inspect dogs” meant but Wilson was kind enough to explain that she “closely and respectfully examined the genitals of slightly fewer than ten thousand dogs, being careful not to cause alarm and moving away if any dog appeared uncomfortable.”