Free to Love: Four Men Rediscover Their Masculinity in an Inspiring Story of Reintegrative Therapy
A groundbreaking new film will spread hope to thousands of men struggling with unwanted same-sex attraction. The movie "Free to Love" tells the story of four men who found their authentic selves outside of the gay community through reintegrative therapy. The therapy did not seek to make them straight but to make them whole, and it addressed the root causes behind the same-sex attraction that brought these four men more shame than joy.
"I wasn't liking who I was becoming, I wasn't liking my behavior," Nathan says in the film. "It wasn't in line with my values. I didn't feel like I was being my authentic self."
"I sought therapy when I realized that these gay-affirming activities, and dressing in the gay man suit, putting on the gay man hat, it was really hard. It didn't feel right," Dennis says. "The changes in sexual orientation, they're a result of a much deeper process of understanding myself, of getting myself unstuck from where my childhood left me."
"Reintegrative therapy for me was finding the disparate parts of myself that had been lost and bringing them together and becoming whole," John says. He recalls a men's retreat years ago. Hearing a "roar of masculine voices," he says, "I felt so fearful ... I was like, 'I don't belong here.'"
After a year of reintegrative therapy, he attended the same retreat, heard the same "roar of masculine voices, and there was such a difference in my body. I loved hearing that, and I was like, 'Let me in there! Let me in there. That's my tribe, I belong.' And that's huge."
Four men — Michael, Nathan, Dennis, and John — all rediscovered their masculinity through therapy. As a result, their unwanted same-sex attraction weakened or dissipated. But that was a byproduct, not the main goal, and they freely chose to undergo therapy knowing that might happen.
"Conversion therapy" has become a hot topic recently. California's state senate just passed a bill to ban advertising for "sexual orientation change efforts" as a deceptive business practice. Groups like the Southern Poverty Law Center (SPLC) condemn conversion therapy as the province of quacks. LGBT activists insist that people cannot change their sexual orientation.
In an interview with PJ Media, Dr. Joseph Nicolosi, Jr., founder and clinical director at the Reintegrative Therapy Association, explained the crucial difference between conversion therapy and reintegrative therapy.
"Conversion therapy is broad, it's ill-defined. There's no ethics code, no governing body, and it's practiced by unlicensed individuals," Nicolosi told PJ Media. "In reintegrative therapy, the client is in the driver's seat. The licensed psychotherapist uses evidence-based mainstream approaches — the same approaches used by clinics across the world — to treat trauma and sexual addiction. As those underlying dynamics resolve, the sexuality begins to resolve on its own, as a byproduct."