Grown Women Don't Read Twilight: Here's an Alternative (That Just Might Save America)

Yep, the world is a horrible place, thinks mom.

Good thing she ferries her children everywhere instead of letting them take the bus, and sets up play dates and makes them wear helmets and shields them from peanut butter.

She photographs every move her children make. She does it because all the other women do, too.

Plus she has some vague notion that all this picture-making is an outward visible sign of her affection.

But in reality, she's avoiding reality, carefully constructing a future-past instead of living in the moment, and holding up a small but powerful barrier -- a camera, a cellphone -- between herself and the kids.

Just like getting those children into the next "good school" is more important than what's happening now.

At the end of a long day doing all that stuff, mom likes nothing more than to curl up with a good book, or maybe a favorite movie.

Something from one of those billion-dollar franchises like Twilight or The Hunger Games.

Which revolve entirely around teenagers fighting each other to the death.