04-18-2018 10:16:00 AM -0700
04-16-2018 01:32:51 PM -0700
04-16-2018 09:59:36 AM -0700
04-12-2018 09:53:41 AM -0700
04-10-2018 11:19:03 AM -0700
It looks like you've previously blocked notifications. If you'd like to receive them, please update your browser permissions.
Desktop Notifications are  | 
Get instant alerts on your desktop.
Turn on desktop notifications?
Remind me later.

President Obama, After Reading AttackWatch.com Submissions, Realizes He Actually Does Suck

Political pundits across the nation are calling it a severely damaging miscalculation by campaign strategists to provide a giant collage of arguments against Obama, and especially, to let him see it. An MSNBC reporter stated anonymously today, “The problem is, the voices against Obama are unfortunately based on the facts of reality. They use sound logic and reason when they decry the president’s policies, actions, and even his core ideology. I had to stop reading it. It’s incredibly hard to evade reality when you're reading that site. Even for us journalists.”



Top White House aides are reportedly scrambling to convince the president that he is mistaken and that he’s actually a good president. White House insiders say AttackWatch.com has been blocked on his computer and BlackBerry, as well as all conservative blogs and the Ayn Rand Institute web site. Further, he has been sequestered by his advisors in what is being called a “re-programming” effort. To quote one insider, “They have taken the president into a room with all his friends and advisors, and several members of the press, and they are all just repeating over and over to him how good he is and how he’s a great president. Once in a while they all just clap, you know, give him a spontaneous standing ovation. Everybody loves a standing O’! They’re telling him he is on the right track, that all this trouble is the fault of capitalism, Bush, the Tea Party, or Vladamir Putin. (No one likes that guy.) It's dicey, but they think they can bring him back around.”