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Shorter Beto O'Rourke on His Paltry Charitable Giving: 'My Gift to You Is... Myself!'

Are you following the Beto O'Rourke tax returns story? You should be, as it's very entertaining.

Robert "Beto" O'Rourke, skateboarding former congressman, wandering writer, and table-dancing Democrat second-placer for Senate now running for president, released 10 years of tax returns. His point in this exercise was to pressure President Donald Trump to release his own tax returns.

Yeah... no. Trump doesn't care what Beto wants him to do. Never has, never will.

And Beto's strategy has now backfired pretty spectacularly on him. Eagle-eyeshades noticed errors on his 2013 and 2014 tax returns: The liberal who wants to spend more of your money underpaid his own taxes a couple of years.

Beto has to break out the checkbook.

In 2017, on more than $370,000 in income, Beto donated well under $2000 to charity. Or, .33 percent. As in one-third of one percent. Insert your own one-percenter joke here. Beto is a marriage-made millionaire. He has piles of money.

Well, Beto took time off from hopping around on tables and bar tops to answer questions about why he gives so little to those in need.

Please read his answer for yourself. And enjoy.

Did you catch that? According to Beto, Beto is so awesome that Beto is his own form of charitable giving. Beto's only regret is that Beto has but one Beto to give. You're welcome, America.