Who Knew the 'MS' in MSNBC Stood For 'Morally Superior'?

The MS in MSNBC stands for Morally Superior, I guess. That explains this:

“I get frustrated...” said Contessa Brewer. “There was part of me that was hoping this was not going to be anybody with ties to any kind of Islamic country. ... There are a lot of people who want to use terrorist intent to justify writing off people who believe in a certain way or come from certain countries or whose skin color is a certain way. I mean they use it as justification for really outdated bigotry."

This may be a big moment for Contessa Brewer, since it’s brought her a wider audience -- and while some may wonder if her name means she’s like Budweiser Royalty or something, she may have a hard time living this down.

But not in her circle. To Ms. Brewer, these are simply the sentiments of a thinking, caring, decent, fair-minded person. If you react otherwise, you’re a squinty-eyed Bubba who thinks this here country started goin’ downhill (spit) since we started lettin’ Veetner-mesians (spit) come in and run restaurants. Not saying they don’t make good rice  because they do ‘n all, but this all here’s a Christian nation. And ah say that in full reee-cog-nition of the Deism of some Founders, inasmuch you can place Deism outside of the bound’ry of angnostercism and link it to yer monotheistic assumptions.

Those are the people who rush to judgment. They hear there’s been a terrorist attack, perform some twisted calculation based on stories from Fox’s highly rated “Jihadis in Your Garage” daily update, and figure it might have something to do with Islamists. Shame! Good people not only don’t judge before-hand, they want to refrain from judging after-hand, so they can theoretically judge someone who didn’t do it, but might.

Here’s what Contessa Brewer must go through when she hears of a terrorist attack anywhere in the world -- meaning, not just Times Square but above 112th and below 13th street as well. (It’s hard for New Yorkers to see beyond their city; there are some who no doubt read “Oklahoma Bombing” and think it’s a story about a Broadway revival closing on opening night.)

Secretly kinda hope that the attack was caused by an atheist -- no, that would empower the religious maniacs who only support Israel so Jesus will have a place to chill when he returns next week.  Scratch that. So:

Hope the attack was caused by one of the several dozen million militia members -- also known as “Midwesterners.” After all, that’s the logical extension of being opposed to anything the government does while in control of the Democratic Party: blowing up that oasis of commerce and gaudy free enterprise, Times Square.

Fingers crossed: Oh, if only the attack was caused by someone protesting Arizona’s immigration policy. Such a thing would be misguided, but there’s a lot of anger out there about a law many say harkens back to Nazi Germany, where they rounded up Jews who had entered the Third Reich illegally, and made them return to Israel.

If it turns out to be someone who went to Pakistan to get training, filter that through the outrage felt by some over unmanned drone strikes, which began under Bush, who superglued the ON-OFF switch so Obama can’t reverse the policy.

Finally, she has to confront the truth, and it’s just ... so disappointing. It feeds into the wrong things thought by the wrong people for the wrong reasons. She’s not alone, of course; Mayor Bloomberg took time out from the thankless task of combatting salt consumption to say this:

“If I had to guess 25 cents, this would be exactly that. Homegrown, or maybe a mentally deranged person, or somebody with a political agenda that doesn't like the health care bill or something. It could be anything," he said.

You have to weep. Bloomberg could have heard a bomber shout I DO THIS FOR ALLAH before he blew himself up, and hizzoner would wonder: alla what? Alla my friends who are having their Medicare reduced? Alla these good reasons which I will not, unfortunately, describe, as I am now chum?

CNN chatterboxes later ruminated that the fellow had a hard life in the U.S. -- couldn’t get a good job, had his house foreclosed on. Granted. But this has happened to many during the Great Recession, and 99.99999% don’t sit down and conclude: “Well, it’s Pakistan for fertilizer bomb training, then.” CBS News runs a headline: “Faisal Shahzad’s Motive Shrouded in Mystery,” which is like doing a story on people lining up for the iPad launch and wondering why so many nerds formed an orderly line outside a store.  It must be terribly frustrating to the jihadis: we’re completely upfront about our goals and rationales, and they still don’t take us seriously. What do we have to do?

They’ll think of something.