Welcome to Francis Ford Coppola's White House

Just seven weeks into his presidency, Barack "Corleone" Obama has gone to the mattresses. His administration has lunged ruthlessly for the jugulars of its critics. His cabinet has more tax cheats than McKellys in a Dublin phone book. Crackdown on lobbyists? Fahgettaboudit. Earmark reform? We don't need no stinking earmark reform. "Today," the new don pontificates, "I settle all family business" -- e.g., nationalizing the energy industry, socializing the health care system, and federalizing American education.

Obama has parasitically used a correctable housing bubble burst and banking crises to power-grab and commit the country to more spending than at any other time in our history. That upcoming Roland Emmerich movie entitled 2012 is supposed to be about the impending end of the world. But Hollywood doomsday may not be necessary; if this keeps up until 2012, Tic Tacs will cost about $60.

In short, Obama is scaring the hell out of everyone. Every time he opens his mouth, the stock market nosedives. But he isn't worrying about those "day-to-day gyrations" because the "stock market is sort of like a tracking poll in politics; it bobs up and down." The country's net worth is plummeting by the hour -- largely due to the seeds of anxiety Obama sowed into the market when trying to pass his porkulus spending splurge -- and he speaks about the relative insignificance of the market's "day-to-day gyrations" as if millions of Americans losing their portfolios and life's savings was a matter of Chubby Checker's "The Twist."

Rome is burning, but how does the godfather respond? By averting attention, of course. By bringing together his wartime consiglieres to go after the Tattaglias, Barzinis, and Moe Greens of his political universe. There's Jimmy "Ragin' Cajun" Carville, Paulie "Bag-a-Doughnuts" Begala, and "Rahm-bo" Emanuel -- who knows all about making people sleep with the fishes -- and Biden can be Fredo, I suppose.

And they're mad. Oh boy, are they mad. You see, a handful of journalists, television commentators, radio personalities, and private citizens have the gumption to question President Corleone's economic policies. And that's a no-no. Never go against the family.

Rush Limbaugh is a mere broadcaster. For weeks we've been told it would be quite anti-egalitarian, the mother of all infra dignitatem acts, if we were to listen or give credence to such a bigoted, homophobic, racist, and cruel miscreant. Yet do Limbaugh's most eccentric or controversial statements surpass anything uttered by senator-wannabe Al Franken?

What's worse: Limbaugh mocking obnoxiously hardcore feminists on his radio program -- we all know the type he's talking about even if you don't have the onions to admit it -- or Sen. Dick Durbin comparing U.S. troops to Stalin, Hitler, and Pol Pot? Why are the masochistic rantings of old man Chomsky or the phony Ward Churchill considered intellectual brilliance -- but Limbaugh's politically incorrect tell-it-like-it-is take on society the most egregious things said this side of Mein Kampf?

The man has his opinions. He's allowed to have them. And while his opinions have made him who he is -- the country's most successful radio personality -- they are still just opinions, not sticks and stones. Limbaugh never threatened Obama's safety and security, and therefore should be of no concern to the Obama White House or the Secret Service.

Limbaugh has, however, made it clear he wants Obama's statism to fail -- an entirely understandable position for a conservative to hold and, at last check, a totally legal opinion to have -- and in response, President Obama first used Limbaugh as his own personal punchline and then sent out his henchmen, guns blazin'. Leave the capitalism; take the cannolis.

It is beneath the office of the presidency to go after a citizen on such a personal level, using political surrogates to mock a man's weight and previous drug addiction all to align him with, and thus undermine, your political opponents. Is this what Obama meant when he invoked biblical scripture during his inaugural speech and proclaimed "the time has come to set aside childish things"?