The Wretched Conservative Spawn Must Not Return!
This appeared in the Washington Post on October 11, 2010:
In their latest attempt to distract voters from their job-killing policies, President Obama, his White House and senior Democrats in Congress have added to their long list of bogeymen the outside groups that seek to help elect Republicans in November. They threaten congressional investigations, leak private tax information and level baseless accusations of criminal activity against those who have been public in seeking to defeat Democratic candidates and their liberal agenda. Without a trace of irony, powerful Democratic officeholders lament that many who support these groups wish to remain anonymous.
None of these Democrats expressed concern about such outside spending in 2008, when more than $400 million was spent to help elect Barack Obama, much of it from undisclosed donors. The liberal groups and Democrats who supported the Bipartisan Campaign Reform Act, which established the legal framework for this new campaign spending, were much faster to adapt to its contours than the Republicans and conservative groups that largely opposed it, and liberal outside groups massively outspent Republicans in the past two election cycles.
Shocking though it is, even the New York Times, our rock of ages, our help in ages past, our hope for years to come, sometimes can't quite get things straight. Now, even CNN may be deserting the path of truth and righteousness with this screed from a senior political contributor:
Every week of this campaign, there has been a new message -- and just like your jobs program, it's not working. And one of the reasons nobody is listening is because what you are saying makes no sense. Americans have been suffering during your entire administration, and before that, with continuing unemployment not seen since the Great Depression.
Oh, I forgot, the recession ended a year ago. And of course every month your team has some gibberish about the jobs picture not being as bad as it looks. How stupid do you think we are? The jobs picture is worse than the monthly statistics and everyone knows it.
It's so very unfair. No wonder President Obama seems exhausted.
Miscreants such as these, masquerading as members of our once-trusted mainstream media, must be shunned and boycotted. False charges such as "nearly half the people who once considered themselves supporters of President Barack Obama don't anymore" must be suppressed. Lies (even if true) must not be allowed to prevail; should they be, how will we be able to raise our youth to understand the true wisdom not only of President Obama but also of his valiant supporters and to accept their wisdom uncritically and without reservation? It works so well in the DPRK that it can also work in the United States if we but try. Teach them to oppose the evil of man corporate-made global warming and to understand the vital need for statist top-down solutions for all of the multiple conservative-corporation caused problems. Take an Islamist to lunch this week. The White House reaches out to them and it's only meet and right that we should do so as well to help atone for all of the bad things we have done to them. Push for Nobel Prizes for the Reverend Wright, Professor Ayers, Osama Bin Laden, Che Guevara, and Hugo Chavez. They deserve them almost as much as did President Obama; as symbols of our enlightened, multicultural ways, they must have them as well.
Of greatest importance, however, we must do more than just clap our hands and vote. We must believe in Tinker Bell President Obama; otherwise, the wicked Captain Hook will win and we will surely lose all truth and beauty in our lives. All that we know on Earth and all that we need to know will vanish. Our lives won't be worth living! I beg you, in the name of Gaia the most holy, vote against evil incarnate as though our lives depended on it; they do.