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Romney If You Will

[ Sung to the tune of "Venus" by Frankie Avalon: ]

Romney If You Will

Hey Romney! Oh Romney!

Romney if you will,

Please nominate a veep who'll make us thrill.

A veep who's good at math and six-pack abs

Who's got the gift of gab,

We'll swoon.

Romney make him young,

A budget wonk who's not so highly strung.

Wisconsites are popular this year,

Your choice is oh so clear: It's Paul.

Ryan, deficit-hawk you may be,

You're perfect for the job,


You're such a big heart-throb!

Ryan has a plan

More serious than Barry's "Yes We Can,"

A fiscal map to stave off bankruptcy

While Biden gaffes and says "Ooopsie."

Ryan, fearless and confident,

You schooled the President


Over the moon we went!

Ryan add the looks,

Subtract the waste and balance all our books,

Divide your foes and make them all feel blue,

And multiply our love for you.

Hey Romney! Oh Romney!

You made our wish come true!

[ If you've forgotten the tune, here's the original; play it softly in the background and sing the new lyrics over it, karaoke-style: ]