PJ Media

Helpline for Abused Men

In response to my post on domestic violence, Jan Brown, the founder and director of the a href=”http://www.dahmw.org/pub/index.php?option=com_contenttask=viewid=1Itemid=5″Domestic Abuse Helpline for Men and Women/a writes in:br /br / blockquoteDear Helen,br /br / Thanks for starting a dialouge about this topic. I started researching domestic violence back in 1996 after a male family member reached out to me and told me of his wife’s verbal, emotional, physical and sexual abuse of him throughout their 13 year marriage. I found out that his options were severely limited by society’s understanding of domestic violence. Male victims are rarely welcomed at the over 2000 battered women’s programs throughout the US and most times they are treated as abusers when they call looking for assistance. In October of 2000 I started a non profit agency. We run the only nationally available toll free crisis line that specializes in offering support and services to male victims of female domestic violence. For the last six plus years over 16,000 people have called our toll free helpline seeking information, support, referrals, and services. Please let male victims know that we are here and we care.br / br /Our toll free line is 888-7HELPLINE (888-743-5754) and our website is a href=” http://www.dahmw.org/pub/index.php?option=com_contenttask=viewid=1Itemid=5″www.dahmw.org/abr /br / PS We receive no federal or state funding, our contributions come from private donations so some of our services are limited, but we do what we can to assist all victims who call our crisis line.br / Sincerely,br / Jan Brown, Founder and Directorbr / Domestic Abuse Helpline for Men and Women/blockquotebr /br /It is good to know that there are services out there that treat men as fairly as women are treated in the arena of domestic violence. If you would like to learn more about the characteristics of men who are abused and the women who abuse them–take a look at a href=”http://www.dahmw.org/docs/DAHMW%20Characteristics%20of%20Callers.pdf”Ms. Brown’s article here./a Not surprisingly, many of the abused men are in their early forties with children who are being used as “hostages” for keeping the men in their situation. br /br /Women, just like men, need to learn to keep their emotions in check before they become angry enough to abuse those they live with and risk harming their families and those they should care about. The site I mentioned above has a workbook by a forensic psychologist for women entitled a href=”http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1572243791?ie=UTF8tag=wwwviolentkicomlinkCode=as2camp=1789creative=9325creativeASIN=1572243791″The Anger Workbook for Women: How to Keep Your Anger from Undermining Your Self-Esteem, Your Emotional Balance, and Your Relationships/aimg src=”http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=wwwviolentkicoml=as2o=1a=1572243791″ width=”1″ height=”1″ border=”0″ alt=”” style=”border:none !important; margin:0px !important;” / that may be a helpful resource. I noticed that the forward was by Sandra Thomas, an expert in anger and one of my current co-authors on a violence article that should be forthcoming. Apparently, the workbook can be used by women or professionals to help reduce feelings of anger and violence.