Obama-Clinton: The 'Not on Your Life' Ticket

You've got a better chance of being Barack Obama's running mate than Hillary Clinton has.

Why does the fantasy of a so-called "dream ticket" still persist at this late hour? Either the press is insulting our intelligence again, or it is has now taken to insulting Obama's. He would have to be a fool and a masochist to make a deal with the woman who would have stopped at nothing to prevent him from enjoying the victory he now should be savoring but can't because she's preventing him from doing that, too.

On a day that saw the first African-American candidate for president clinch a major party nomination, all anyone could talk about was the chutzpah of his erstwhile rival. In the face of actual defeat, Clinton promised to stick around until she could "catch her breath," which really meant catching all the good headlines. "She's Still Here" ran the title of Maureen Dowd's well-cited New York Times column (prompting many of us to realize for the first time in a while that Maureen Dowd was still here, too).

Michael Tomasky used his perch at The Guardian to complain that Clinton's selfishness kept him from using it to congratulate Obama instead. And nearly every item featured Tuesday on Memeorandum, the political blog roundup website, had something to say about Clinton's next move, or the actual nominee's first challenge-namely, how to gently coax that rampaging Gorgon into submission.

She has now selected Saturday as the date to "suspend" her campaign, endorse her opponent, but not concede her pledged delegates and superdelegates to the man who would be president. They might still come in handy to negotiate a cancelled $20 million campaign debt, a cabinet position, or the vice presidency. Or some radioactive material might ooze out between now and the Denver convention, making Obama unable to fulfill his electoral duty, in which case the Party would rally around Clinton with whippet speed and be greeted with the gloat of "I told you so." Well, a girl can dream, can't she?