Now the EPA Wants to Regulate How Cold Your Beer Can Be

At least, that's the eventual result:

In a seemingly innocuous revision of its Energy Star efficiency requirements announced June 27, the Environmental Protection Agency included an "optional" requirement for a "smart-grid" connection for customers to electronically connect their refrigerators or freezers with a utility provider.

The feature lets the utility provider regulate the appliances' power consumption, "including curtailing operations during more expensive peak-demand times."

So far, manufacturers are not required to include the feature, only "encouraged," and consumers must still give permission to turn it on. But with the Obama administration's renewed focus on fighting mythical climate change, we expect it to become mandatory to save the planet from the perils of keeping your beer too cold.

I know I'm about to sound like a conspiracy nut, but hear me out on this.

The Administration's war on cheap electricity, new regulations to raise the price of air conditioning, its determination to drive up gas prices, new CAFE standards to make our cars smaller, the high speed rail boondoggles...

I'm starting to suspect all of these things are designed to force people out of the Sun Belt suburbs and back into cold northern cities. Where, presumably, they'll go back to voting Democrat.

Do you have a better explanation? Because I hope I'm not just going crazy.